Things Kids Say

After I judged a school talent show:
Elementary student: *runs up to me and stares at me open-mouthed*
Me: Um... hi?
Student: Are you a JUDGE?
Me: Yes, I was!
Him: Whoooooooa, COOL! *runs away*
(I'm basically a celebrity)

9th grade girl: Miss, how do you draw circumcise?
Me: Uhhhhhhhh...... Are you sure that's what you mean?

Student: Can you check what I wrote here?
Me: Let's see... um... what does this word say?
Student: It says anonymous.
Me: Oh. I can't really read it.
Student: It's a work of art, and if other people don't see that, it's not my problem.
Me: But if people can't read your handwriting, it kind of is your problem.
Student: It's abstract art, OK?

Student: Did you dye your hair?
Me: No. Does it look like I did?
Student: No.
Me: ...................

Little girl: *flops down on the seat next to me* How old are you??
Me: I'm 31. How old are you?
Little girl: I'm 6.
Me: You wanna know a secret?
Little girl: Uh-huh! *nods vigorously*
Me: In TWO days it's gonna be my birthday. And then I'll be thirty TWO!
Little girl: Whoa....
Me: Is that pretty old?
Little girl: Yeah, but that's OK. My daddy is older. He's about.... um.... 81 or 82, I guess.
Me: Are you sure?
Little girl: *scrunches up her face in deep thought* Ummmm.... pretty sure!
Me: Maybe you should ask him about that sometime...
Little girl: Maybe! *runs away*

A friend made me a birthday brownie with a candle. Her two daughters watched me blow out my candle. Then the 3 year old had some comments.
Kid: Did you make a wish for one hundred and ten million babies?
Me: Um... well... that's kind of a lot of babies.
Kid: Yeah. And if you wanna move, then you should wish for 25 airplanes to carry them too!

In 11th grade math...
Me: Turn with me to page 831....
*Waits about 15 seconds for students to get books out and start flipping pages*
Me: Page 831, guys...
*Less than 5 seconds pass
Student DH: What page?
Me: I've said it twice now.
Student JM: Twice is not enough.
Me: Twice is once more than enough.
JM: No. Once is not enough. Twice is basic.
Me: Are you calling me basic?
*Class collectively gasps*
JM: Wait! No! That's not what I said! I mean... NO! I didn't say that! What page are we supposed to be on?
Me: Please. *eye roll* You can't even keep up with someone basic like me.
*Class collectively dissolves into hoots and raucous laughter

Sunday Drive

There is a student teacher working at my school this semester. She is only here for a short time - just 5 weeks. Of those 5 weeks, only 2 remain. This student teacher is an avid photographer, and someone told her that I was as well. So she asked if I would take her on a photo taking expedition sometime. Of course, I agreed, and yesterday was the day we agreed upon. I asked what kinds of things she enjoys photographing, and she asked specifically if I would take her someplace where she could see the mountains. I one-upped her and took her to THREE different spots that have a great view of the surrounding mountains! Our little excursion was a great excuse for me to dust off my old DSLR and snap some photos too. Here's what I ended up with.

Location 1 - A rural neighborhood on the outskirts of town

Location 2 - On the tracks through the lake outside of town

 Location 3 - Rice fields located within city limits

The beauty of this country that I get to call home never ceases to amaze me! And mountains will always be novel to this Midwesterner. :)