what's that noise?

so somebody is going to be staying at my place part of the time that i'm gone over the coming couple weeks.

and since ibu hasn't worked for like a week and a half now and there have been 3 cats living in my house, i decided it was time for a good clean.

first step, kick the cats out. they're old enough now. i put a sarong in the bottom of a box and put it in a place that will stay sheltered and dry in the alley behind my house. i'm not entirely coldhearted. and it was christmas, after all.

then the cleaning started. and as i was cleaning, i kept finding curious little sticky yellow puddles under, beside, and behind everything i moved. (yes, mom, i even clean behind things!) my house didn't actually smell like cat pee until i cleaned it. and then i couldn't get rid of the smell no matter how much deodorizer and floor cleaner i used. i swept and then mopped three times. then i used a rag and hand scrubbed the floors. i finally ended up having to use a toothbrush to bleach the floors then open all the doors and windows and turn the ceiling fans on. that seemed to do the trick. my house is really really clean now.

i was getting ready to start cleaning the bathroom when i heard what sounded like voices outside my house. at first, i thought it was a couple of the guards stopping for a chat on their rounds. but it sounded like they were singing. sometimes the guards do sing... but it wasn't them. it was call to prayer! so i checked the clock. definitely 4 AM. wow, i got really into cleaning.

in retrospect, that was kind of funny. i had gone to sunrise service that morning in town. at 4 AM. so on the biggest Christian holiday of the year, i both woke up to and fell asleep to the 4 AM muslim call to prayer.

leaving for the islands in less than 12 hours. i haven't even packed yet.

vaca-what?

so sometimes vacation doesn’t seem like much of a vacation. but it is always full of blessings, big and small. and parties. oh, the parties.

we had a half day of school friday, and thanks to my intense desire to be done with school, i had all my grades turned in before the final bell even rang. i was so ready to get out of there. and then the principal announced over the PA that all teachers needed to report to the auditorium for staff lunch. i was pretty bummed about having to stay longer. but turns out, this staff lunch was put on by the parents of our students. and it was a whole christmas spread, including three golden brown turkeys and homemade cranberry sauce. wow.

that night, i had not one, but TWO parties to go to. the first was a chili cookoff. i don’t want to brag or anything, but i’m pretty sure i unofficially won. then i went to some other friends’ house to watch cloudy with a chance of meatballs on the projector while laying on pillows in their backyard. awesome movie. watch it. really.

saturday i went to semarang with some friends to see new moon. awful movie. don’t watch it. really. i fell asleep after the first 20 minutes and woke up in time for the very last line. that is what i call good timing. after that, we went to yohanes’ parents house for a huge get together with his entire family and college friends. i started to feel a little awkward when i noticed that several of the men in yo’s family were coming to stand surreptitiously “beside” me (sometimes that meant behind me, depending on which way i was facing at the time) while who i assume to be an uncle was taking “our” picture from the corner. found out later his mom has designs on me. and didn’t really keep it a secret. fantastic. (side note: yo, if you are reading this, it’s more funny than awkward. promise. i like your parents.) we went to an outdoor lounge afterward that was built on a perch overlooking the whole city. we sat there drinking awesome drinks (honey, milk, and peach and strawberry ice cream – new favorite drink) and talking and taking pictures for an hour and a half STRAIGHT (nobody takes pictures like asians). we definitely got home well after midnight. which was a good feeling. because one of the best parts of break is staying up late and sleeping in!

sunday, i went BACK to semarang with charles and marie. to buy cheese. and to help them shop for christmas for the orphanage. i found feta! mm mm mm. AND miracle whip! kraft products were banned until just recently. i also found cherry tomatoes, mozarella, chocolate banana bread, and real-ish milk. this was obviously an above average shopping trip. i felt a little extravagant buying all those things, but you never know when you’ll see them again… oh, and we got clothes for 16 boys. that was mostly marie though. i just held the baby. and told her if things matched or not. while eating lunch, we ran into a family from charles’ parents church in jepara. they are extremely wealthy and support his church a lot, so as we approached them, marie quickly whispered to me, “shake hands and suck up.” okaaaaaay. i tried to be as charming as possible in a language i don’t really speak. i sat next to a really old guy in a wheelchair who kept talking to me, but i didn’t understand a thing he said. (marie said later that she can't understand him either, which made me feel a lot better.) luckily, in typical indonesian fashion, he asked a lot of questions, and each question ended with “ya?” (example: this food is really good, ya?) so i just said “ya” and smiled and nodded a lot. i have no clue what i was affirming or might have been agreeing to. but he seemed happy, so that’s good. his wife decided i am too old to be single (i AM getting there in this culture), so she promised to keep her eyes out for a suitable match. maybe i should give her yo’s mom’s number. they can duke it out.

(totaling up the last of the clothes for the orphanage)

monday was a staff christmas party at our superintendent’s house. and as much as i love hanging out with my fellow teachers, a better opportunity presented itself. a family who serves on another island was visiting and they were having dinner with some friends of mine that night. so i went there. the place where they live is very strongly muslim. but the husband was explaining to us that even more than that, this place is very strongly under the hold of satan. they are muslim on their ID cards, but they are more concerned with the spirit world than they are with the koran or with prayer. to witness to these people, he said that he often has to get them to be muslim FIRST, and then use that to lead them to christ. he also said that because he regularly reads the koran and is well known and respected in the area, people there will often say, “i wish i was more like him, he is a good muslim.” they were an awesome family, and i’m glad that i got to spend some time with them.

tuesday was the international school staff christmas party. all the indonesian staff get together and put this on for all the other staff. this year, i got to be designated photographer. in the auditorium. with all the lights off except for stage lights. ugghhhh. i think i did alright though. in a dress and high heels. i even understood the christmas sermon! well, most of it…

wednesday, GT and wiwik FINALLY got married! again, i was designated photographer. i was a little nervous about this one. i really had no idea what i was getting into. indonesian weddings are very different from american ones. and this wedding was particularly unique in that it was entirely planned in 10 days. also, the inside of the church was neon lime green. at the reception, there was a catered buffet, but NO tables or chairs! that was gt’s decision because he didn’t want people to linger. it worked.

today is christmas eve. i prayed a couple weeks ago that my christmas boxes would get here on time. God answered with, “what is christmas, really?” so i thought about it and came back with, “Christmas is about You. but You know how important it is for me to have that connection to my family when i am so far away. it means a lot to me.” and God said, “of course i know. your boxes will come.” so every day for two weeks, i’ve been bugging the office staff to see if my boxes came. nope. and school offices were closed today. so i asked charles to take me straight to the post office (i didn’t know where it was) so that we could check there. he did. they checked their incoming package log books for my name (yeah, records here are kept on paper. in ledger books.), but i wasn’t in there. then the man remembered, “two boxes came just a few minutes ago. we haven’t had time to process them. wait here.” he came back with two boxes that had my name on them. way to pull a last minute trick, God… though i already suspected that would be the case since it usually is. i got my boxes. and i’m really happy. and i’m being a very good girl and waiting until tomorrow to open them. also, the guy at the post office asked if charles is my dad. this is funny for two reasons. 1. he is only 10 years older than me, and he is pretty young looking. 2. he is 100% indonesian. i really don’t know how anyone could possibly assume we were even distantly related. i’m going to call him dad from now on, rest assured.

tomorrow, of course, is christmas day. sunrise christmas service in town and then i am apparently spending the day with charles and marie and another family that lives here. marie says if i don’t, she is telling my dad. i told her that he wouldn’t care. she said he would care that i was spending christmas day all alone. she might have me on that one. not really sure. how about it dad?

saturday… there is something going on saturday, but i totally forget what. hopefully it will come to me before then. or else get cancelled.

and then sunday… we take a bus to solo, a train to surabaya, a plane to lombok, a taxi to the northern point of the island, a boat to gili, and then a horse and carriage to our hotel. we like to use as many modes of transportation as possible. keeps things zesty. i am looking forward to getting away. majorly. and a lonely little beach island sounds perfect.

right here is good too though. my three cats are curled up in one giant ball sleeping beside me on the couch, and christmas music is playing through my speakers. oh, and don’t forget about the half eaten dead rat outside my door that was on my couch when i woke up this morning. festive.

and this thing was in my yard earlier. sorry, had to share.

Tis the season

One more day of finals!

I was a little bored today… I was giving two finals. And by “giving two finals” I actually mean “watching a DVD on my laptop and knitting while students took the final.” I figured since there was only one student in each class, I don’t need to watch them like a hawk to prevent cheating.

I think the rain thought the final school bell today was a starter’s pistol. It started pouring right as the bell rang. So now we all get to go home in the rain. Now there is what sounds like a 2 year old sitting outside my window yelling, "STOP THE RAINNNNNN NOW! STOP THE RAINNNNN NOW!....."

I have some weird rash or reaction or something on the top of my foot. The school nurse said just put hydrocortisone on it, but that really doesn’t do much. So I started rummaging around and found something that an Indonesian friend bought me when I burnt my leg and it got all infected. The label says it’s good for exzema, minor burns, rashes, irritation, etc. So I started using it. And it’s clearing up. Then I read the label. It’s 10% placenta. Fantastic. Twice a day, I’m rubbing placenta all over my foot.

My kittens are vampires. They were in the ceiling of the building next door for their entire lives thus far and so now they are scared of the light. They won’t come out from under my bed, which is where all my luggage was stored. That got relocated to under my desk for fear of my duffel bag filling up with cat pee. So far they’ve been very well behaved, going in the litter box and sleeping soundly all night long. I usually can’t believe that I have 3 cats living under my bed because I can neither hear or smell them. That is good news.

I've been working on filling out a recommendation for MIT. Thee MIT. As in Massachusetts. Intimidating. They ask all kinds of questions. But it's for a student that I really love and respect, so no problem giving a glowing report. I just feel like I have to do so perfectly. Because it's MIT.

Some students were complaining yesterday that my classroom smells like death. I couldn’t smell it. Until today. In one certain spot. So I searched my room, pulling books off shelves and everything out of drawers. No luck. I noticed that it smelled worst right in the middle of one wall. But there’s no way for anything to die in the wall – they’re solid cement. Weird. So I recruited Casey to come help me. He’s considerably taller than me and couldn’t even smell the stench. Until I convinced him to squat down. Then he almost immediately traced the smell to an electric outlet. He went to get a screwdriver, and sure enough, a poor gecko had electrocuted himself to death in there. It was very gruesome and smelly.

Casey pretty quickly decided he didn’t want to touch it, so he called one of the maintenance men to come do it. (“That’s why I hire employees.”) Poor guy replaced the whole outlet for me. Once he knocked the gecko out of the old one, it fell on the floor and started wiggling around. A miracle? We might have thought so until larvae and maggots started crawling out its stomach. I’ll spare you that photo. It was kind of like watching a small scale horror movie. With real life stink.

Humor for today:

Jose: Can I go to the bathroom?

Me: Jose, there’s like 7 minutes left in class. Can’t it wait?

Jose: It’s an emergency.

Me: Do you have diarrhea?

Jose: No.

Me: Then it’s not an emergency and you can wait.

Jose: It’s an emergency. Pleeeeeease let me go.

Me: A real emergency?

Jose: Yes, I think my water is about to break.

Me: Uhhhh… I doubt it.

I don't know why stupid blogger double spaces things sometimes. I can't make it undo that. Sorry.

stranger than fiction

i had a very odd moment in the school bathroom today.
the facts are these:
i had just come out of a stall and walked across the room to one of two sinks.
above the sinks is a long mirror, typical in a girls bathroom.
i watched as i walked toward myself, or rather, toward my reflection.
i was contemplating my hair.
more specifically, why it was sticking up in that manner.
as i neared the sink, my hands instinctively reached for the handles to turn on the hot and cold water simultaneously, thus resulting in warm water.
my right hand found what it was looking for.
my left didn't.
i stopped looking at my hair and shifted my gaze to my hands instead.
i realized that there was only one handle on the sink, now within the grasp of my right hand.
there had only been one all along.
i felt a bit silly as i realized that having two handles was a british convention and that the last time i used one of those was when i lived in kenya, exactly 2 years ago.
but then i remembered that my bathroom sink at home in america is like that too, and so surely the british must not have a monopoly on dual-handled sinks.
so maybe i'm not crazy after all.
not so fast: i don't have a bathroom sink at home in america.
so then, the kitchen sink.
does it have two handles or just one?
i think one.
the kind you lift and swivel to control the temperature.
or maybe two.
by this point i was very confused and mildly agitated.
water was just running into the sink.
and i was just staring at it.
then the startling realization hit me.
i have been gone so long that i can't remember anymore.

btw, mom, if you could email me sometime and tell me how many handles the kitchen sink has, i would appreciate it a lot. or maybe send a picture. thanks.

wonders never cease

as usual, the weekend proved to be the never ending adventure that it always is.

1. in a total lack of foresight back at the beginning of the quarter, i assigned quarter projects to all be due the friday before finals. i totally forgot that i would be writing finals and giving last chapter tests all right around that time. so on top of everything else that made last week hectic as all get out, i had to grade 36 quarter projects, a book, and 2 portfolios over the weekend. ugghhhh. guess who spent all night on friday at the coffeeshop with a stack of papers to be graded?

2. coffeeshop was pretty fun though because my old friend, parjo the barista was back in action! haven't seen that guy for a few months, but he's back behind the counter and still remembers my favorite drink!

3. it came out friday night (because all the good action goes down at the coffeeshop) that some threats have been made against our community. i don't want to go into too much detail because at this point, i don't really know what should be said and what shouldn't. but there's a fairly high ranking military man who approached a man in our community and demanded that he give him a white woman to have sex with. obviously, this presents a few problems. first of all, mr military man is married, and nobody in our community is going to help him have an affair. also, no white woman around here is even remotely similar to whatever his perception of white women is. that was explained to mr military, and he became irate. he threatened to kill one member of our community specifically, and then he went on to say that he has anti-american friends in the military who would love to have an excuse to do something to our community. we don't really know whether to take this guy seriously or not. is he just talking big to get what he wants? we are being more cautious though. not going anywhere alone, dorm kids have to be in by 8 now, etc. the problem is that we can't go to the police; the military are above the police. i'm not sure what's being done at this point, but we would appreciate your prayers for safety and for a quick resolution for all of this.

4. after all of this friday night, i FINALLY learned how to play dance dance revolution! also, i'm really, really bad at it. i attribute that to being middle class, midwest, and white.

5. saturday i realized how spoiled i've become when i went to babysit for charles and marie. besides having a dorm with 10 pre-teen and teenage girls, they also have 4 kids of their own. luckily, the oldest, joshua, was gone. unfortunately, bethanie, the 5 year old had 2 friends over. and they were wreaking havoc. they kept trying to eat cookies out of the kitchen, the baby had just woken up and was crying, and sammy, the 1 year old wanted to go outside and he is now tall enough to open doors and let himself out. so in the middle of holding a crying two month old, trying not to slam doors shut on sammy's fingers while attempting to keep him inside, and controlling three screaming 5 year old girls in pink dresses, i finally just shouted, "WHERE HAVE ALL THE IBUS GONE?!" there are normally 4 of them there. 2 working in the dorm, 2 taking care of the kids. they do everything. they keep us sane. and they had ALL gone home. rough. we managed. by the time charles and marie got back, the girls had been fed and were playing what appeared to be some rendition of hide-and-seek, baby was almost back to sleep, and sammy was playing happily outside with one of the dorm girls.

6. i got informed that my church is no longer having church. rough. so now i need to find a new church, i guess? and unfortunately, i have very little motivation to do so.

7. that night we had our last solafide (fellowship) of the year. it was a christmas party! we even had kind of a band going on... 2 singers, 2 guitars, and a piano! yours truly played the piano... i was amazed that i still could. it's been 7 years since i really played. i could tell i was rusty, but we made it through the evening without making any epic mistakes. it was fun, but i was pretty peopled out. so i spent a lot of time afterwards laying in the yard talking to mel and tiff and ariel. it was good times.

8. then i went to linegars and stayed there until midnight just being cozy and eating ice cream and watching movies under the watchful protection of the christmas tree.

9. i woke up sunday morning to the sound of my cat howling outside my window. but there was another cat making noise too... a much smaaaalllllller sounding cat. so i jumped out of bed, threw open the door, and standing there was my cat - and a kitten! she brought kitten inside and deposited it in my bed where it immediately began burrowing tunnels in my blankets.

a short while later, cat left again and returned over the back wall with a kitten dangling by the scruff of its neck from her mouth. she tried to stick this one inside a duffel bag under my bed, but i wasn't too keen on that. so that one went in the bed too. while momma checked on the other baby, she let me cuddle with the new one.

they're basically adorable and already going in the litter box. one of my students asked to have one of them a long time ago, and she was so excited when i told her this morning that the kittens are finally home! so there's a good home for one of them... not sure yet what i'll do with the other. for now, i'm just enjoying their cuteness. oh, but they got kicked out of the bed once i found fleas on them. so did all my sheets and blankets. sick sick sick.

10. i went to play more ddr with ariel and mel. we had lots of fun switching the level to expert while the person playing wasn't looking. i apparently look like i am trying to line dance to every song. ariel looks like he's at some kind of hiphop hoedown. and mel kicks our butts every time. then i rode my motorbike home in the pouring rain and spent the afternoon snuggled on the couch eating cheese and watching the office. oh, and reading a book in indonesian that ariel gave me. i made it to page 12 yesterday. incredible.

11. i ended the week by calling brian, newly returned from a tour of duty in iraq! it was awesome to get to talk to him, if only for a little bit. he was up fishin with the guys and didn't have good signal. i'll try again later.

i must be looking older

jordan: were there computers when you were our age?
luke: she's not THAT old, guys. the computers just stunk real bad.
me: well, you'll say that about your computers too 5 years from now.
*some silence*
jordan: were you alive during the holocaust?
luke: oh, my gosh. they ARE actually retarded... (*forehead palm slap*)
me: uhhmmm... do you know the actual dates of the holocaust?
david and jordan: yes.
me: my GRANDMOTHER was a child during the holocaust!
david: really? so when was your first dinosaur sighting?

http://edition.cnn.com/2009/CRIME/12/07/connecticut.chimp.attack/index.html?eref=igoogle_cnn

1. monkeys are never cute.
2. monkeys are never to be trusted.
3. even trained and domesticated ones.
4. but especially not wild ones.
5. under no circumstances.

places to go

glory: it's so hard to arrange a meeting with you.
me: why?
glory: because you have not much time.
me: and you have not much time.
glory: yeah.
me: and my not much time is not at the same time as your not much time.
glory: exactly. that's why it's hard.
me: so when do you have not much time?
glory: oh, i have a lot of not much time.

a present from Jesus

friday i was walking to my house when i spotted something shiny in the grass.
naturally, i went to see what it was, hoping for money.
i was not disappointed.
it was a quarter!
an american quarter!
how odd...
so i picked it up and looked more closely.
minted in 1986. same as me.

so there i was.
walking.
on java.
when i happened to find a quarter.
from the same year as i was born.

me: *looking credulously at the sky while holding said quarter in the palm of my hand* God? is that You?

and the best news!

in the craziness of the day, i have forgotten to say this:

KIM CAME HOME YESTERDAY!!!

and she is feeling so good after 2 weeks in ICU in singapore that after flying into semarang, she, clayton, yo, and gt spent TWO HOURS shopping and walking around the mall there.

i got to go see her last night, and she herself says that based on how she feels now, she can't believe that she almost died just 2 weeks ago.

God IS bigger!

paper

remember all those rules i put in place several weeks back for the rowdy 9th graders? one of them stated that if they slander, put down, or badmouth in any way anybody else in class, they have to write a paper on it explaining why they should not have said what they said, complete with Bible verses. i got a beauty from one student today entitled "Why I Shouldn't Insult People". It reads as follows.

"When I called Jose stupid it wasn't nice, even if it is true it isn't nice, therefore I shouldn't have said it. The Bible says to "love your neighbor as yourself", and I wouldn't have liked it if he said that to me. Also, I shouldn't have told Aditya to shutup. What Aditya has to say is important to [sic] therefore I shouldn't have said that. The Bible says to "love your enemies." Therefore I should love aditya and not tell him to shutup. Also, I shouldn't have called Kyuho a ho because obviously he isnt a ho because a ho is usually a woman, and obviously Kyuho has never done that."

well, i can see this student learned his lesson. ahem....

i found where my cat had her kittens at! and they are still alive! unfortunately, i cannot see them... i was out to dinner with some friends last night. one of them, andre, teaches indonesian at the language school next door to my house. apparently she had her kittens in the ceiling of one of their classroom buildings! so now during class, they can hear cats mewing and thumping around up there. oh no! dre assured me that they are no bother and that when they get bigger, if they are still trying to live up there, they'll have the guards get them down and bring them to me. whew! he replayed the following conversation for me from class earlier this week:

andre: oke, silahkan mengulang. (ok, please repeat after me)
cats: MEW, MEW, MEW!!!

he apparently thought that was hilarious, because throughout the evening, he repeated it 3 or 4 times.

visits from history

my skype has been real weird this week. it keeps sending me messages from the past. for example, yesterday, i thought katy was talking to me, but then i looked at the time stamp and realized the message was from the day before and that katy was currently offline. this morning, i got this one from over a week ago when the family + gramma drove to oklahoma to be with zach. this one made me laugh. and miss my family. love you guys!

18:36 - Love you
Have a wunnerful day - Mom

20:11 - You there?
20:11 - Hello Hello Hello
20:13 - Anyone there?

20:31 - Ijam going with your folks to see zach. am at your house right now waiting for the car to get here and your dad too. Deb took me to hicksville and your mom picked me up there wich was about half way .worked out very well. think the car is going to be loaded for bear with all the stuffweare taking.wished i could have gone to see you too but kn ew that was not possible. excuse the errors i am making.love you and take care .grandma

rice babies

5 kg bags of rice were distributed to all the seniors today for them to clothe and decorate. these will serve as their "babies" for the next 7 days. it's part of their contemporary issues class project. we don't get those fancy high tech talking, pooping babies over here. just rice. oh, so asian.

so at lunch, i got into a fantastic conversation with yejun regarding his naked rice baby.
nat: so who's the father?
yejun: it was a virgin birth.
nat: then who's the mother?
yejun: me. i virgin birthed the baby in ways you cannot imagine.
nat: ooohhhhh.
yejun: and its name is going to be PMS.... or Satan.
alexa: PMS?
yejun: yes, it's short for peter mose sullivan.
me: well, that's a very korean name.
yejun: i can't give it a korean name. it's white rice.

geometry today

me: uh-oh... we have a square root of 2 in the denominator. what do we need to do with that?
david: multiply both sides by the square root of 2!
me: both sides? but there's no equals sign.... so there is no "both sides".
david: uhmmm.....
jenna: oh! multiply by something equivalent to one, which would be the square root of 2 over the square root of 2! so top and bottom are getting multiplied by the same thing.
me: RIGHT! good explanation too.
david: that's what i said!
me: almost.... both sides implies there's an equation. top and bottom would imply a fraction.
david: *mumbles* you're gay.
me: WHAT?!
david: OH MY GOSH! i'm SO SORRY! it just came out!!! OH MY GOSH!
luke: david! are you ACTUALLY retarded?!
david: I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING!
me: woowwwwww....
david: I DIDN'T MEAN IT! YOU ARE SO HOT!
me: DAVID! you are NOT helping your situation at ALL!
david: why?! i'm trying to be nice!
me: oh, dear.....
luke and jordan: *chanting while banging fists on their desks* slap him! slap him! slap him!

things i’m thankful for

Number one.  My family and God's protection over them. Sometimes, I  think about how easy it is for bad things to happen.  There've been times when it's even been hard not think about those things.  And when I'm so far away from home, that's a really scary thing.  But God has always been so good to my family.  Nothing bad has ever happened to us.  We're healthy.  We’re warm and dry and safe.  We have the things we need, and plenty more.  No matter how far from home we go, He is there with us.  Sometimes I forget about that, but if I look, it's easy to see.

Number two.  My friends.  Around the world.  You are my surrogate family.  To those I’ve left: I miss you.  You are irreplaceable, and I can't wait to see you again.  To those here: thank you for who you are and what you mean to me.  It breaks my heart think about the day when you will become those I’ve left. And if I write any more in this category, I will cry on my computer, which is not ideal. I love you all.

Number three.  My job.  Seriously, I have like the coolest job in the world.  I get to hang out all day with awesome kids who love Jesus.  Yeah, some days are better than others, but no matter what, I love my kids and what I do here. God opened some serious doors to make this happen, and I am so thankful He did.

Number four.  The experiences God has allowed me to have.  I have had quite the life - and gosh, I’m only 23!  Earlier this week, I was reading my journal from college.  It included a lot of memories from high school and before.  I was just reminded of a lot of the experiences that I've had.  Some good, few bad. Some bizarre, few normal. But all leading up to who I am today and preparing me for where I am in this moment.

Number five.  The knowledge that my God is the biggest.  He is bigger than allah.  He is bigger than me.  He is bigger than the demons.  He is bigger than my circumstances.  And He always wins.

Number six. The rain. I hear it right now. It makes everything green. It sustains life. It keeps the heat away. It sings me to sleep.

Number seven. The body of Christ. It is living and active in every part of this world. Everywhere I go, I find it. I’m learning to see the beauty of it.  I’m thankful that it is here, and I am thankful that I get to be a part of it.

Number eight. The little things. Like the fact that technology has progressed to the point where I can call my family when I’m homesick. Or that feeling of accomplishment I get after having a conversation in Indonesian. Or that I’ve only ever found snakes outside my house and not inside. Or that my pembantu is an awesome cook. Or that Christmas vacation starts in 3 weeks.  ALL these – and SO many more – are things to be thankful for!

all 88

last night i went to a piano concert.
i have never heard such incredible playing in my life.
i didn't want him to stop.
during one song, i could hardly breathe.
it sounded just like water.
sounds like that don't come from this instrument.
at least, not for most people.

but anthony hartono is not most people.
and he is only fourteen years old.

skypes with dad

[11:10:34 AM] dad: I'll take lots of pictures this weekend
[11:11:16 AM] me: i don't want to see them
[11:11:43 AM] dad: even if I don't photograph the food?
[11:11:55 AM] me: oh, that's fine then.
[11:12:00 AM] me: i also don't want to see people having fun without me.
[11:12:01 AM] dad: k
[11:12:11 AM] dad: shellfish
[11:12:15 AM] me: so maybe some pictures of crying or sleeping people would be fine.
[11:12:31 AM] me: or maybe just send me some pictures of strangers or wildlife in the area.
[11:12:57 AM] dad: strangers crying in their sleep?
[11:13:49 AM] me: THAT'S IT!
[11:13:55 AM] me: yes, that is perfect.
[11:14:00 AM] dad: I'll try

mom and dad and gramma and kyley are renting an impala and hauling a turkey 11 hours to have thanksgiving in oklahoma with zach. meanwhile, i'm in rainy season in indonesia. and not very happy about it.

madura (mis)adventures

our trip to madura this weekend was like a train wreck from start to finish. (note: no trains were harmed in the making of this blog post) it all started with kim, which i mentioned in my last post… she had surgery thursday morning for kidney stones. routine procedure. it went well. kidney stones gone. we got on our bus and left shortly after lunch. by late that afternoon, it became obvious that kim was not doing so well. we are still not sure if a mistake was made on the part of the doctors or if kim just reacted very negatively to the anesthesia. at about 4 o’clock, we got word that her blood pressure had dropped dangerously low, she had been placed on oxygen, and though she was conscious, she couldn’t hear anything. by 8, they had called in the family. ron, her husband, made plans to come early the next morning from sumatra to be with her. we were hundreds of kilometers away, and there was nothing we could do except pray.

we arrived in madura at about 11 with no further word on kim. however, within 30 minutes, GT got word that his fiance’s father had died. pak tukiman had been a driver for our school for many, many years, so all the teachers and many of the students knew him. he had been in and out of hospitals for the last 2 years, so his death wasn’t entirely unexpected, but he had been doing somewhat better lately. GT made plans to head right back home by bus early the next morning. poor guy spent the last two weeks driving to aceh and back, only to arrive in madura, then have to go straight back home!

friday morning, GT left, and we got word that kim had not improved overnight, so she was being med-evacuated to singapore to be put on a ventilator. but nobody could contact ron. so with even more prayers being said, we headed to the local middle school to teach english. our experience at that school was great! the kids did a fantastic job teaching things like action verbs, emotions, conversation questions, and several other things.

their students responded well, and they even took time to sing and play music for us!

after we got back from the middle school, a small group of us went directly to a local nursing school where we practiced conversational english with the university students there. they were excited to have foreigners come visit them!

on our way back from the nursing school, we got a phone call from someone at the middle school we had been at earlier. she called to tell us that the police were there questioning them about our visit, and they wanted to know our REAL reasons for being in madura. she said that they were sending some officers to our hotel to talk to us. once we got back, jesse immediately went in search of yohanes to translate for him. i went back to my room to change out of my long sleeves, pants, and head covering (madura is roughly a billion degrees), but something told me not to. so i left my room, planning to wander to the beach. instead, i found nasreen and two police officers walking toward me. then we began to play 20 questions, which was not so much a fun guessing game as it was two surly cops asking me 20 very pointed questions and me trying my best to give 20 very polite, complete, and unincriminating answers. luckily, nasreen stuck around to translate. an eternity later, jesse and yohanes found us and took over. it seemed there were two options at this point: either they would make us pay them a lot of money (which we would not do) or they would make us leave.

in the meantime, some students had gone to the beach with no shoes and had actually WALKED ON CORAL! like, open your eyes? so on top of everything else, we now had blood and deep cuts to contend with. nasreen and dan, two of the seniors on our trip, opened up a little patching up shop with the bus first aid kit, and i came to help after my encounter with the police. everyone was fixed up in no time.

then some students and i walked across the street to a little food stall to eat lunch. unfortunately, nearly all the other students NOT involved in the interrogation – spectating or otherwise – had the same idea. can’t blame them, given that it was the only place to eat for 100 meters. and that is a far distance in the blazing heat. there were only four tables in there, and they were totally packed out, so the owner invited us to go next door and wait for our order there. wearily, we marched out of the warung, glad for a place to sit. and then we realized that next door was a mosque. and we’re not exactly halal. so we went back inside to ask the proprietor if that was REALLY what he meant, and he said ya, ga pa pa (no problem). we could eat there. so we all kind of looked at each other with that “what do we do now?” look in our eyes, and we wandered back outside. in a sudden burst of good vision, one of the students noticed some rickety looking benches in the shade along the side of the mosque, so we all sat back there instead. while waiting 45 minutes for our food, we spent quite a bit of time in prayer for all the things that were heavy on our heart that day, and it was an awesome and encouraging time… i love our students!

whew… this is getting long… stick with me…

shortly after we finished praying, jesse and yo came over to eat, and we were able to ask them about the police visit. like He always does, God worked things out and softened the heart of the police. they took copies of everyone’s IDs and told us that before we come next time, we needed to report to them. whew… that situation could have been a WHOLE lot worse, and in fact, everyone who has heard about it has been amazed that it wasn’t any worse! apparently, madurese police are known for their corruption – and indonesia is the second most corrupt country in the world! go, us…

while walking back across the street after lunch, we encountered an unusual scene – two parents beating their teenage daughter in the street. she was screaming and sobbing and laying in the road. they were trying to drag her out of the road while landing a few punches here and there while they were at it. right as we arrived, a teenage boy sped off on a motor bike, and we heard it rumored later that they had been caught together at the hotel. this is a bigger deal in muslim culture than i can even begin to describe to you. worthy of beating your daughter in the street in front of everybody. of course, nobody touched the boy… it was a very awkward situation though as we stood there trying to figure out how we could help, but quickly realizing that as foreigners, there was absolutely nothing we could do.

the students spent some time at the beach that day, and about 30 students from yet another school came to hang out with them and practice conversation. i crashed for 2 hours at this point from sheer emotional exhaustion, but i heard that many, many good conversations were had, and some students told me that this time was the most meaningful – and their favorite – part of the entire trip.

that evening, we drove to a nearby town to have dinner. there were WAY more food options there! and nobody had to be asked to sit in a mosque! as long as the students stayed in non-coed groups of three or more, they were safe to go wherever they wanted. we also left plenty of time for them to be able to hang out and meet people. there is a large muslim school nearby, so there were LOTS of opportunities to meet other middle/high school students. and they did! it seemed that everywhere i went around town, i would find a group of our students surrounded by a group of indonesian students! i myself was thronged by a group of second graders… not sure how that happened? maybe because my vocabulary is right about at their level. all their parents were food vendors nearby, so they were basically left to their own devices all night long. we had fun singing songs, counting in english and madurese, and talking about our families. they were super fantastic! when we had to leave, about 40 little kids paraded with us through the streets to our bus, cheering and singing and waving goodbye.

the following morning, we packed up all our things, checked out of our hotel, and drove to a local pesantren (muslim school) where we again taught english.

this school was night and day different from the school the day before… of course, this one was still noisy and chaotic, but it was also MUCH less respectful, especially toward women. the male students (and even some teachers!) were very disrespectful and even perverted, coming onto our female students and even me in very inappropriate ways – especially for muslim culture! it was unfortunate and very disappointing. even as a teacher, i was scared to go anywhere by myself in this school. it was VERY male dominated – the girls didn’t talk or participate in class at all. but AFTER the teaching, when we got time to just hang out with them girl-to-girl, they really opened up. we spent about 2 hours there after classes talking to them, getting to know them, sharing with them, and exchanging email addresses.

we left to come home after our time at the pesantren. by this point, we knew that GT had made it home safely and that kim was in more stable condition, but that she had an infection in her lungs (which turned out to be double pneumonia – she’ll be in ICU in singapore for several more days, but her entire family is with her now. please keep them in your prayers!). so spirits were much higher coming home. God has a way of working everything out.

after we crossed the suramadu (the bridge from madura to java) – which is one of the longest bridges in the world! – we stopped to change clothes. nobody really wanted to wear their muslim garb the entire way home – especially not the girls! so we stopped at a gas station. since there was one bathroom, 11 girls, and 25 guys, we decided that the guys would all change on the bus, and the girls would all change in the bathroom. to get to the bathroom, you had to walk through a sliding metal door into a 9’ x 12’ tiled room. in the back of this room were 2 doors. one led to a toilet stall and one led to a musholla. the toilet was occupied. by our bus driver. who had the runs. roughly 5 minutes later, he finally came out. we all decided quickly that none of us wanted to go in after him, so we closed that door behind him, made sure nobody was in the musholla, and decided to slide the big door shut and all change at once in the tile room. so we did. and when we finished, we found that we were locked in. in the 100 degree bathroom. that didn’t have windows. that smelled foul. luckily, a jaga came with a key (on his 5th or 6th try!) and freed us. gas station air never smelled so sweet.

i am happy to report that the bathroom incident was the last of our misadventures. we got home safely at 2 sunday morning. we’re all a little tired and cranky today. some more than others. me more than others. but in the words of my dad, which became my motto for this entire trip, God is bigger.

in control

wow. so this madura trip... it will be interesting.

kim had surgery for kidney stones in semarang this morning. praise God that's all it was! it could have been any number of more serious things. needless to say though, she won't be going to madura with us, which is a bummer. this is her trip. she always goes. she has great relationships with the schools and the people there. and she's the one who knows what she's doing!

as of 8 o'clock last night, yohanes and gt were stranded in jakarta. they were on their way home from their road trip to sumatra and had flown from medan to jkt, but once there (at about 1 pm), they found that there were no more flights and the bus to anywhere local had already left. yo mentioned that he had lots of stories to share, so i smsed back, "will tomorrow's 10 hour bus ride be long enough for all your stories?" to which he replied, "tomorrow?!" uh-oh.... they both thought we were leaving friday! so after explaining to them that we were leaving at noon today and stressing them out to their wit's end, we had to contemplate whether or not we could get along in madura with no translators. thank heavens they were able to find a night train to solo.

that left one problem though - how would they get from solo back home? they called kim's husband (who is currently working on another island) to ask if they could use her car so that yo's brother (a driver) could pick them up, and he said yes. but i informed them that her car is here at school, she is in a hospital 1.5 hours away, and nobody has the keys. not kim (who i had to wake up by calling to ask if she knew where they were.....), not me, not the jagas. ugh. they finally got tracked down. and yo and gt made it home safe at 6:30 this morning.

one student who was supposed to go woke up with a fever this morning so can't join us. however, yo and i both seem to be mostly over our sicknesses of earlier this week.

please continue to pray that God will protect us and keep us all healthy. madura would be an awful place for anyone to get sick...

pray without ceasing

an excerpt from a mass email i sent out earlier. . .

" Dear family and friends,

Until I sat down to write this, I hadn't realized how long it had been since I last wrote! I apologize for my lengthy silence.

I would like to break my loooonnnnnnng period of silence by asking for prayer. Every semester, our school has a three day weekend that is designated for ministry trips. This semester, that weekend is this coming weekend. Some of the trips this semester are here in town and last only one day. Some are to towns nearby where those involved will be spending the night. But every semester, there is always a trip to another island of Indonesia called Madura. Those going will stay from Thursday - Sunday. While I am asking prayer for ALL of these ministry trips, I would especially ask for you to partner together with our school in prayer for the team going to Madura (I will be going as well). Madura is a very strictly Muslim region and parts of it are under Muslim law. Because of this, when we go, all the girls must wear pants, long sleeves, and head coverings, and we cannot be very free in what we say. Because of the nature of our trip, I would rather not share many details via email, but I can tell you that we will be working with several schools there to teach English. We are planning to visit 2 schools but are expecting to get invited to more once we arrive (this is what typically happens).

Specific things that I would ask prayer for:

1. First and foremost, health and safety for all the teams. Every team except one (which will be working on campus) will be doing some traveling; the team to Madura will be driving most of the night Thursday and again Saturday to make the 10 hour drive there and back. Flu has been going around the past couple weeks, and some of the teams will be staying in village homes, so those are both major health conerns.

2. Unity on each of the teams. We have a handful of kids at our school who aren't saved, and in fact, there are 5 Hindu students going on the Madura trip. Also, as with any group of teenagers, there are some who struggle with having people in authority over them. Please pray for those students as well.

3. Pray that through all things on each trip, God would be glorified, and that love would be able to reach places where our actions and our limited language cannot - both to the people we are working with and the people we are working for.

4. Pray for the leaders of each team, that God would just give us an enormous amount of wisdom in directing the students, in organizing the trips, in trying to keep 120 highschoolers safe and healthy, and in reaching others. Please pray also that we would be willing to be led by the Spirit in whatever He would have us do.

I appreciate very much your support through prayer for not only me, but for our entire school body as we set out this weekend to be a blessing to the community around us!"


Something I would now like to add....
Please pray that Satan would be bound. He is certainly attacking us even now as we make preparations. There are 5 adults that are to go on this trip. Two fellow teachers, Yohanes, GT, and me. Yesterday, Yohanes woke up with a fever and I with a nasty head cold. And this afternoon, one of the other teachers was put in the hospital, possibly with kidney stones. She is the leader and organizer of this trip, but right now, it's looking like she won't be going with us. This puts me in the position of being the only female adult going, which is a little daunting. Please pray also that no matter what happens, God would work through it. And pray for the other teacher, Kim. If it's not kidney stones, there is a possibility that it could be something more serious. They'll be doing more tests tomorrow (Wednesday).

things unseen

it was a very strange weekend that started with a murder mystery and ended with john wayne. and nothing in between was any less random.

1. friday night was the annual 8th grade play, which i understand to be the epitome of 8th graderhood. it was very agatha christie of them and written by the 8th graders themselves! very well done. after the play, i hung out with some of the 10th graders and was invited to a future sleepover with some of the girls.

2. cat came home. but she's really in and out. which makes me think that she's got kittens hidden away somewhere. mostly she only wants to eat at my house and not visit or sleep. she's been hunting around the house. i helped her take down a massive skink (lizard) on saturday. possibly the biggest one i’ve ever seen. she crunched up the whole thing, bones and all. she's a veritable garbage disposal.

3. saturday i discovered that a lot of the dvds that wouldn't play in my old computer WILL play in my new one! so i definitely watched like 6 dvds back to back. i was just checking them, alright?!

4. saturday night i went to a friend's house where we watched a 3 hour bollywood movie and ate sour gummyworms. i left after 2 hours of the movie. i couldn't take it anymore. it was all in hindi. with indonesian subtitles.

5. when i got home, there was a snake in front of my house! i decided to try to kill it with my foot, so i stomped its head pretty good. unfortunately, not good enough. it was bleeding out its head and very angry. so it coiled and struck at me. good thing i had taken its moment of shock at being stomped on to jump away from it. i decided i didn’t want to mess with it, so i yelled for the jaga, who RAN over to me, knife drawn, and chopped that sucker right in half. my hero.

6. then, in a sudden (and rare) burst of inspiration, i got artistic! i came home and created things with sharpies until about 3 in the morning. things i actually LIKE. which is even more unusual…

7. i woke up sunday at 11:30 (good thing church had been cancelled) to an sms from yo asking me to take some money to his brother who is visiting from sumatra. he ran out of money and can't get back home. so half awake, i headed over there to give him some gas money. yo's mom asked me if i wanted to talk to yo, which is strange because yohanes and gt are both still gone. i didn't know what to say. so then she told me she thinks i'm getting sick, but i'm not allowed, because Jesus told her so. yes, ma'am.

8. after that, i headed into town. it seemed like there was an awful lot of traffic. i realized why when i got stuck in a traffic jam that involved dancing dragons. it was a chinese holiday. i managed to get out of that traffic jam and tried to circumvent it, only to find myself in another jam. so i took a different road to a different part of town, only to find the street i needed closed off. i'm sure glad i have my license plates though, because i passed at least 20 cops directing traffic. i FINALLY made it to the bank 45 minutes later (for what should be a 5 minute drive, tops), then to the store to pick up some essentials. like pomegranate juice and toilet paper. one leads to the other.

9. i got almost all the way home and realized that yet ANOTHER road was closed. i was all grumbling to myself about my bad luck when i heard the music... it was another horse dance. so i drove over and saw that nothing was really happening yet, so i prayed for awhile then went home.

a few hours later, i went and got marie (who had never seen horse dance), and we grabbed our cameras and headed over to see the action. naturally, as soon as we got there, it started pouring rain so hard that within seconds, the road had become an ankle deep river. luckily, a fellow teacher lives just a block over from where the dance was, so we hightailed it over there to seek shelter (and towels) for the cameras. ugh. eventually the rain stopped and we headed back over.

this horse dance was a little different. it was the same "troupe", if you can call them that, that i saw last time. but this time, they were using little boys. one boy looked no more than 10. and he was possessed. the field they were in had turned to mud, but that only made them dance all the harder. and they were fighting. and they were feeding cabes (reputably some of the hottest peppers in the world) to one of the guys. after they cast the spirits out of him, the very first thing he did was throw up all over. i never really thought before about what it must feel like to be thrashing your body around into stone walls and into the ground and burning yourself and getting whipped and eating nasty things, and then waking up from that and being able to feel it all. sounds horrible.

after the spirits were cast out of everyone, they got volunteers from the crowd for their last act. there was a large bamboo pole, and they would get 5 guys to come hold it. then the bah-wang (the man who had control over the spirits) would simply move his hands from some distance away, and it would cause the pole to spin around, no matter how much the guys were pushing and straining against it. creeeeeeeeepy.

10. after all the so-called festivities ended, marie and i headed home. i drove her to school, and as we were getting our bags checked by the guard at the front gate, we heard this awful crashing sound behind us. i turned around and saw that some parjo had managed to get his bike up on the sidewalk and had thrown himself off into the shrubbery. now, this is a fantastic feat, given that the curbs here are at least a foot high. i have no clue how he managed to get a motorbike up there, but he did so spectacularly. and he was fine. just a little shaken up.

11. when i got home, there was a tree frog with orange stripes sitting in my window and a bunch of dead termites on my floor… yes, it’s termite season again. also, the biggest ant i’ve ever seen was in my shower. almost 2 cm! then a grasshopper was sitting on my sink faucet when i tried to use it. and later on my toaster. and even later, right on my laptop. same grasshopper. apparently this was the weekend for creepy crawlies in and around my house.

12. and then, to finish it all off, i watched mcclintock last night. my first john wayne movie ever. i’ve been missing out all these years. it’s strange to watch old westerns with non-americans though. so much of the subtle humor is lost.

weekends are the best times for adventures. always.

WHERE'S MY CAT?!

so ever since my cat came back, needy and pregnant as ever, she's had this routine...
she spends the days while i'm at school laying on the couch, watching ibu work.
she greets me when i come home, then she goes into my room and sleeps on my bed.
unless i go into my room. then she gets up and goes to sleep on the couch.
until i go back to the front room. then she goes back and gets in bed.
right around the time i go to sleep though, it's time for her to go hunting.
every night, she leaves between 10 - 11 and returns in the wee hours of the morning.
i wake up with her either in my bed by my feet or sitting on the rug outside the front door.
and a new day starts.

two nights ago, i was watching a movie on my couch.
at about 9, cat slinks out of my bedroom, yawning and stretching, passes me on the couch, and marches out the front door.
and she didn't come back the next morning.
i didn't see her again until i came back after school.
she was waiting for me.
and quite a bit thinner and bedraggled than she had been the evening before.

kittens? yup.
but where?
in my bed? no.
in my laundry? no.
in the bathroom? no.
under the couch? no.
no kittens to be found anywhere.
i searched and searched. inside and outside.

i finally gave up and sat down to dinner.
cat was not feeling well though. she HAD to sit in my lap. (unusual).
and she was feeling very moany and mopey.
i would too if i had just given birth, i'm sure.

then i went to church at 6.
and i haven't seen my cat since.
i left her moaning in a ball on my couch.

i'm a bit concerned for her well being.

2 situations i can imagine.

1. she had babies and didn't know what to do with them (since it's her first time) and they either were born dead or died soon after. and there were complications resulting in her now being dead somewhere too.

2. her kittens are actually alive and well someplace secret and hidden and she has left me to go care for them.

the first one seems more likely.
she is too stupid to take care of herself, much less children.
but time will tell, i suppose.

quote(s) of the day

david: ms p****, are turtles insects?
me: uhhhmmm..... no.
david: (to jordan) i TOLD you!!

jose: kohl is singing a bad song.
me: kohl, PLEASE stop singing. for the millionth time. no singing. no rapping. no rhyming. no speaking in rhythm.
kohl: i'm not rapping. i'm just singing britney spears.

aditya: i don't want to travel 10 hours by bus to madura. i'm too lazy.
kohl: your MOM is too lazy.
me: *glare*
kohl: WHAT?! that's a GOOD thing! that's what pembantus are for!

me: josh, your portraits project is good except for the fact that you were supposed to use a variety of models and you used 4 high school girls.
josh: well, who else should i use?!
me: we have an elementary school! use kids! you have dorm parents! use adults!
josh: i can't ask my dorm parents! that would be so awkward!
me: why? they don't have to put on skanky clothes and stand in the middle of a forest in order to get good portraits! just have them sit for you!
josh: but then i won't get good pictures! you have to do kinky things for good pictures! i can't ask my dorm parents to do kinky things!
me: uhhhh... are you sure you know what kinky means?
josh: yes! it means awkward and a little sexy!
me: uhhh.....
kelsey: i think you should check definitions before you use words.
josh: me and yejun studied for SAT vocab!
me: and kinky was one of the words?
josh: yes!
yejun: oh, yes! i think that's the one that means "somewhat naked".

still

it STILL hurts to even walk.

i regularly have to hide my white comforter in case cat decides to give birth while i'm not at home.

i decided yesterday to go to madura in a couple weeks.

i went to a concert at the college last night. it was sweet. there was break dancing. and banjos. and rock and roll. and kroncong. and traditional javanese music mixed with electric guitar and drums. and little ballerinas. and one of the finalists from indonesian idol.

yo and gt just got to jakarta. they'll be driving until sunday to reach aceh. i miss them.

one of my male students has a mancrush on my brother. he watches my screensaver and waits for a photo of him to come up. it is awkward.

speaking of my brother, i found out that his birthday is NOT on thanksgiving this year. it is, however, on idul adha. the second biggest muslim holiday of the year. congrats, little brother! you win the birthday lottery!

ibu bought me a TON of very sweet smelling flowers yesterday. now if i could only figure out what they're called in english. . . maybe jasmine? honeysuckle?

i'm learning some afrikaans. which also means i'm learning some dutch. lekker.

i really want the bell to ring so i can go home and eat homemade guacamole and chips.

i made the 10th graders teach themselves today. it was fun. but i should probably not do that more often. they might start to think i'm lazy.

i talked to katy for a long time this morning. it was really really good.

i get to ride a horse and milk a goat in 2 weeks! things like that probably don't make normal people quite so happy.

a once in a lifetime experience. i hope.

earlier this week, a friend asked me if i wanted to hike merapi. my first thought was “no”. i probably should have stuck with it. but… it was a small group of girls going. and they were planning to go slow and take it easy. and i figured if i didn’t do it now, i never would. and i live on the most active volcanic island in the world, so why not climb its most active volcano? you know, while i’m in the neighborhood…

so we left salatiga at about 10:30 friday night, getting to the base of merapi at nearly midnight. our guide, pak superman (no joke), met us. he served us all tea and invited us to sit for a bit before leaving. unfortunately, he had a stomachache, so he sent us with 3 other guides, including his son. we set off at about half past midnight.

the first part of our hike was just making it to base camp. this entailed what seemed like an endless walk up a paved road through town. i was ready to give up at that point. after about 30 minutes of walking up the steep hill, we hit camp, and the road turned to narrow dirt trail. luckily, the moon was nearly full, so we didn’t have to use our flashlights much to see.

(the moon was still up over merbabu when the sun rose)

our group of 7 was quickly divided up into those who were going fast and those who were going slow. in front, there were 3 of us with two guides, and farther down the mountain, the remaining 4 hikers with the other guide. we would stop often and wait for them to catch up. it was great at first, because i could use up all my energy going quickly for a short amount of time, then take a short break while waiting for the others. sadly, my body didn’t agree.

we hadn’t even made it a quarter of the way before my heart started beating erratically and i was getting dizzy. one of the guides caught on pretty quickly that i was not ok. he asked me what was wrong with me, and i told him, “jantung saya sakit.” i have heart problems. he nodded and made a silent decision that i was under his protection. there is no way i would have made it up the mountain without him.

he made a point of staying directly in front of me, no matter where i was. and whenever we would hit a particularly steep part, he would grab my hand and help me up. there were quite honestly a few parts where he straight up pulled me up that mountain. and for about the last hour of the hike, when i basically just wanted to die, i don’t think he let go of my hand a single time. when i needed a break, he would stop and make me sit down. when i wanted to give up, he would tell me i could do it and he would pull me on a little further. and i never had to say a word to him.

so we went along like that. one girl had gotten sick and stopped about halfway up with another hiker and one guide. pita was with me and my guide. and the other three were somewhere ahead of us with our third guide. occasionally we would come across a group of campers with a fire and we would warm ourselves up and eat a piece of fruit or bread. we could never stop for too long though, because the tigers might get us. just kidding. we would get really really really cold though if we sat still for too long. even around a fire.

we hiked like that for four and a half hours. in the dark. in the cold. oh, and all our guides were smoking at least part of the way. fantastic.

the way merapi is shaped, at the top of the mountain, there is a plateau that faces east. but then beyond that is the true peak of the volcano. it’s about an hour hike from the plateau to the top, and the hike can be quite dangerous, as it’s all just a terribly steep pile of volcanic gravel, more or less.

(the peak, from the plateau)

it was just starting to get light out when pita, our guide, and i made it to the plateau. it was also VERY windy and VERY cold. so we decided to stay there rather than hiking to the top. we slid (on the gravel) partway down the backside of the mountain so that we wouldn’t be in the wind so much, and we waited for the sun to rise. luckily, we only had to wait about 15 minutes. by then though, my body was so cold that i felt like i was on fire. my eyes were stinging, my ears were burning, and my fingers and toes were numb. and i had five shirts on! i tried to take some pictures, but we only saw about 15 minutes of the sunrise before we were ready to head back down.

people always say the climb down is the worst part. i beg to differ. granted, there’s no fun in climbing down… but it’s infinitely better than hauling your body step after step up a rocky incline beyond the point at which your entire being screams that it can take no more. the walk down took about three hours, but at least we had light to see. and i have to say, it’s a good thing we climbed in the dark, because if i had seen some of the rocky walls and steep pathways that were in front of me going up, i would have quit long before i reached the top.

(try walking up this for 5 hours in the dark!)

the parts of the trail that aren’t rock or stone are dirt. loose dirt with rocks mixed in. that made coming down that steep of an incline terribly tricky. everybody slid and fell (and slid some more) at least once. one girl with not-so-good shoes slid out nearly 20 times! base camp was quite the sight for sore eyes by the time we reached it! but the worst was yet to come…

after resting at base camp for about 15 minutes, we tackled the road into town. i’d say this road is about a kilometer long, straight down a steep hill. true, it’s not loose dirt and gravel. but by that point, it felt even more difficult than that. i found that walking backwards worked really well and saved my poor quivering legs from even more undue trauma.

at about 9:00, we finally made it to the very bottom and collapsed into some chairs on pak superman’s porch. he was feeling better and made us some delicious banana pancakes for breakfast!

(indonesian banana pancakes – with chocolate syrup!)

the rest of our group, who had gone to the very peak, made it down the mountain about an hour later. our car was supposed to pick us up at 10:30, so it seemed like good timing.

and then 11:00 came. and we were still there. and then 11:30 came. and we were still there. tiffany called the car company and found out that the driver was going to be late (duh) and that he would be there sebentar (in a minute). then 12:00 came. and we were out of water. and we were out of food. and it was getting really hot out. and we were all too weak to walk anywhere. so we called again. and were told that our car would be there sebentar. mmhmm. sure. needless to say, we were all in a very pleasant mood.

i had to pee. and then i decided that the walk down the mountain was nothing compared to having to squat over a toilet AFTER the walk down the mountain. i have never in my life wished so badly to be a man.

our driver finally showed up at 12:30. we got home at 1:30. i slept until 7:30. i ate dinner and went back to bed at 10:00. i woke up this morning at 8:30. and i can’t lift my legs. there is not a part of my body that doesn’t hurt. it hurts even to touch anything.

and the worst part is that i don’t really even feel any sense of satisfaction or victory in climbing that mountain. maybe when i’m old, it’ll be a cool story to tell my grandkids. maybe by then i’ll be done wishing i had just stayed in bed that night.

merapi, you win.

wake up call

i woke up this morning to the sound of my cat outside my window.
it was a beautiful sound.
i haven't seen her for 3 weeks, mas o menos.
i actually thought she was dead.

i was wrong.
she's knocked up.
part of me is happy she's back.
and part of me is even excited about kittens.
but part of me doesn't want to deal with it.

but at least the rat/snake/pest killer is back in action.

and there might be kittens within the week.

conspiracies

i just found a very illuminating website run by Christians (naturally) in which they claim that the wizard of oz was made by the occult, beyonce is practicing satanist mind control over her fans, lady gaga is a tool of satan, and rihanna's song "umbrella" is an invitation for the devil to rape her. i mean, it's so obvious... how did i miss all this? sigghhhhhh.... people.

i also just found out that the registration and license plates for my bike are FINALLY ready! they said 2 - 3 weeks. it's been almost 5. yes, i've been driving illegally. granted, only around this part of town. mostly. it'll be nice to feel free to go anywhere for the first time.

i'm gonna try to hike merapi this friday night. "try" being the key word. i'm not really sure if i can do it. it's an all night hike. we're leaving at 8 pm, and we'll be lucky if we see the sunrise. i'm going with a group of girls, so that helps. hopefully i won't be too far behind everyone else. i figure by saturday evening, i'll mostly just want to die.

but i can't! because i have a date with mr l to watch harvey! we love old movies, and so far, nobody else does. yo and gt, my usual weekend accomplices, are going to be on a different island for the weekend. they get to road trip to sumatra. i'm extremely jealous, but oh well. i have a job. and a girl - especially a white one - should definitely not be traveling alone with a couple indonesian guys.

i watched all 4 seasons of criminal minds in the past 2 weeks. it feels strange to have a life again now that that's done. one in which i'm looking over my shoulder and leaving lights on a lot.

it is hot hot hot these days! i was sweating by 7:30 this morning. we thought rainy season was starting a couple weeks ago, but it was only toying with us. hasn't rained all week, except a quick sprinkle 2 nights ago. my hair is reacting negatively, as expected.

charles and marie have a new baby, william. since they can't legally adopt him, he's technically a foster child. they're still not sure what God has planned for his future. but he's an adorable little thing who definitely needs some love in his life!

gramma taught me how to crochet when i was like 8 years old. unfortunately, i never progressed past crocheting one looonnnnnnnng strand that could wind its way through all the rooms in the house. until this week. mom brought me a ton of yarn and a crocheting needle when she came (among many other fantastic things that i had been craving for a year) and i promptly taught myself how to actually make something useful! so far, i've made 2 hotpads (can you believe i went almost a year and a half without owning any?!), and i'm starting on a scarf. which might seem ridiculous, given that i live on a tropical island. but you'd be surprised.

christmas plans are in full swing. yo found us an awesome bungalow to stay in on the nearly deserted tropical beach island of gili air for new years (thereby avoiding last year's bali madness), then after about a week of that - and once the holiday is over - we'll likely head to a semi-remote part of bali to spend a few days before coming back to java. i'm excited. come here, christmas!

ninth grade is undoubtedly my hardest class to teach. there's only 10 students, but i have ALL the loudest and most attention needy kids in that class. i also have 2 of the kids who get teased the most and 1 of the kids who tends to tease them the most. and there is no quieting them down. i had about all i could take last week, and so i decided to appeal to their intellect by explaining to them how disrespected i felt every day and how little respect i saw them exhibiting toward each other. they quickly got in a shouting match, trying to outargue each other in their claims that they did respect me and that they were just "social" kids. so the next day, i instated my first ever seating arrangement and laid down some rules with serious consequences. so they started asking questions, two of them being "do you hate us?" and "which class is your favorite?" so i told them honestly that i didn't hate them, but that they did sometimes frustrate me, and that geometry was my favorite class to teach. so they asked why. and i told them that it was because geometry is my favorite part of math and because the 10th grade class is very respectful, but at they same time, they get excited about learning math. so now the 9th graders have decided that they want to be my favorite class. and the loudest kids in class have now become the ones who remind others to be quiet or raise their hand. i have not heard a single insult hurled yet this week. i have not gone home from work frustrated a single day this week. this is fantastic... my only concern is this: did i just pit two grades against each other in a competition to be my favorite?

i'm the little one.

i'm the little one.
Originally uploaded by i_am_amity

this might be my favorite picture i've ever taken. i keep looking at it.

9th graders

me: ok, here's your test.
*i hand it out to everyone, then go sit at my desk*
david: *raises his hand* can i borrow a pencil?
me: yeah. *i take him a pencil*
*i go sit at my desk*
kenny: can i have a calculator?
me: sure. *i take him a calculator*
jose: can i have a calculator too? i forgot mine.
me: sure. *i take him a calculator too*
*i sit at my desk*
aditya: can i use my calculator?
me: does it simplify square roots for you?
aditya: kind of......nnnnnnnyes.
me: then no. get one of mine.
aditya: there are none.
me: *i look for my third calculator. take it to him. go back to my desk.*
kyuho: i ran out of lead. can i borrow a pencil?
me: yesssss..... *i take him a pencil*
jenny: can i use a piece of loose leaf? i'm going to need more paper.
me: fine. anybody need anything else before i sit back down?! maybe a nice glass of ice water or a shoulder massage?!
jose: oooooooh.... ummm...... i don't think it's very appropriate if you massage us.
me: sigghhhhhhh....

what? hey! how'd that get in here?!

Here's a fun game. It's called Find the Poser.

Ready? Set... Go!

"The other men charged were identified as Mohammad Abdul Bassir; Muhammad Abdul Salaam; Abdul Saboor; Mujahid Carswell; Abdullah Beard; Mohammad Philistine; Yassir Ali Khan; Adam Hussain Ibraheem; Garry Laverne Porter; and Ali Abdul Raqib." - CNNnews

hotel searching

i'm searching for a hotel for us to stay in while on gili over christmas break... here are some fantastic website excerpts. needless to say, we will likely not be staying at any of these hotels.

Lovely open-air bathrooms.
[Excuse me?]

The entire place decorated with "BOLLYWOOD" style.
[The fact that you wrote it all in caps is supposed to entice me even more?]

Each room facilitate with an open-air bathroom featuring natural stone from south, bathtub, terrace, king size bed, television,mini bar, safe deposit box and american standard toilet.
[Wait, wait, wait. . . the king size bed is IN the bathroom? And what is this natural stone you speak of? Does it have an accent? And what is with the open air bathrooms?!]

Enjoy a total relaxing by staying with us, .....Get........Catch.....Sea.....Sand.......Sun...and of course a lots of fun... this bungalow managed by a local family.
[Hmmm.... I'd bet the website is too.]

The hotels itself providing airport land.
[You can land a plane there? What?! The whole island of Gili isn't big enough to land a plane...]

Traditionally styled buildup of international standard and comprehensive support serious are keynotes of this Villa Hotel.
[Buildup just sounds gross.]

Hotel features grass roof .
[Bugs. Need I say more?]

Run by an Italian called Nino and his Indonesian partner.
[What exactly do you mean by "partner", partner?]

kodak moments

bethanie: can i come home with you?
me: sure, but we have to check and see if my cat is there.
bethanie: right, cause i'm lergic!
me: right. she's probably gone though. she ran away again.
bethanie: ran away?
me: yeah. sometimes she comes home, and sometimes she goes away for a few days.
bethanie: where does she go?
me: i don't know. maybe she has a secret boyfriend somewhere.
bethanie: yeah! or maybe she goes to visit her mom and dad!
me: maybe, but i think she's an orphan.
bethanie: oh. that's why you dopted her?
me: yup.
bethanie: i wonder where she is.
me: well, if you were a cat, where would you run away to?
bethanie: i would run away to you.
me: *thinking awwwwwwwwww!*

last night, i was at home reading when every single female teacher showed up at my neighbor's house. granted, there's only 5 of us... but still, the 4 who are not me were all over there laughing and chatting and eating. we really have good community here, and it seemed strange to me that the 4 of them were hanging out and i wasn't invited. especially when i live in the same building as 2 of them. and the longer i sat there and listened to the sounds of dishes clanking and loud laughter echoing, the more upset i got. i think i let satan get in my head and lie to me a little bit. right about that time, yo sms-ed to say he was going to kim's house to eat french dip subs. he asked if i wanted to come, but i was so down on myself by that point that i made some excuse about not wanting to intrude in someone else's house. so a couple minutes later, i got another sms from him saying that he had asked kim and she said i should come. after a few more sms-es, i finally relented. especially since ibu had only made me a salad for dinner - and not even with chicken like she normally does! i was pretty hungry by then.
so me and my bad mood headed over there to find kim recooking all the food for me (i guess they had eaten and already put the leftovers away). she helped me dish up and showed me what to do (can you believe i've NEVER eaten french dip before?!), and she left me in the kitchen. but as she was walking out the door, she turned around and said to me, "you know, you never have to have an invitation to come here." i almost burst into tears right there, with my head halfway in the freezer looking for ice cubes. i always feel so loved in that house.

yo had to leave, but a little while later, he came back with gentur and a guitar in tow. after playing a fanastic game of seeing who could make the stopwatch on yo's phone start and stop the fastest (i am the undisputed champion, with a record time of 00:00:00.07!), the three of us decided to go up on the roof. we grabbed the guitar and some candles and went up. at first we just passed the guitar around and played and sang a bunch of random songs (including christmas carols!), but we quickly turned to singing praise songs. and after one particular song (Lord, I offer my life to You), gt asked if we could pray together. his actual question was whether it was alright if we spent sometime interceding for one another.

i was kind of surprised. in a good way. a very good way. i guess i'm just not used to hang out time turning into prayer time. but i'm glad it did. we all had a chance to share with each other and lift each other up in prayer. and all of us have some heavy stuff we're dealing with and praying for right now.

i don't know how long we sat there. holding hands. praying. by candlelight. on a roof. in indonesia.

that's one of those "i'll never forget the time. . ." moments.

and i came away from it VERY blessed.

as of late

1. my parents are home safely... it was REALLY exceedingly good to have them here. i hadn't realized how used to living alone i'd gotten though. i could tell by the end that being around people 24/7 was wearing me down. but did i get a break? no, of course not. they left on wednesday night... luckily it was late enough that gt, yo, and i got to all take them to the airport, so i got some moral support from friends. (thanks, guys) and then thursday, naturally, i had school all day then fellowship in the evening.

2. and then friday until saturday, on top of normal school duties, i was also helping out by babysitting a family of 4 kids while their parents are in padang doing earthquake relief. that was draining. i spent a lot of the time just wanting to retreat into some deep, dark, quiet hole. no such luck. we experienced things such as head wounds that bled profusely. twice. a dog trying to run away. a thunderstorm. fights over the remote control. a pembantu burning her arm. homework troubles. a head hitting a tile floor. lost keys. and the list goes on. the kids were enjoyable. and i was VERY glad to have some small way in which i could help with earthquake relief. i just wish i'd been in a better mood.

3. after all that, i spent sunday alone. all day. until nighttime. i was so emotionally/mentally drained that i slept straight until almost noon. NOON! it was perfect though, and i feel SO much better today and ready to face the week. this only serves to further confirm my suspicions that the Myers Briggs test i was forced to take in college that declared me an extrovert is nothing but a load of rubbish.

4. rainy season is finally moving in. it's rained every day for a few days in a row now. with that comes BIG winds in the afternoon (ushering in the change of season) and cooler temperatures, finally! unfortunately, that also means that the mold will soon rear its ugly head. ugh.

5. yohanes: hey, did you know that in america, you can just turn the faucet on and get a drink from it?
me: what? really?! just like that?
yohanes: yeah, it's really cool.
me: straight from the sink and you don't get sick?
yohanes: yes!
me: wow. and what does the water in america taste like?
yohanes: tastes like chicken!