Reasons Why I Hate Whiteboards

Call me archaic, but I would choose a chalkboard over a whiteboard any day. Luckily for me, I have one of each in my classroom, side by side. Not so lucky for me is the fact that the chalkboard is approximately 23487 years old and made of some sort of material that is incredibly difficult to erase and just about any chalk I use on it squeaks something fierce. So I mostly just end up using the whiteboard.

But after 3 periods straight of teaching with the whiteboard, my hands look remarkably similar to how they did at the end of the day when I worked in a machine shop back in college, minus the millions of tiny shards of metal embedded in my skin.  And look, I actually found a picture from like 5 summers ago to illustrate this – not of the hands specifically, but the overall affect… You get the idea.

I don't remember this ever being a problem in the States, but for some reason here, whiteboard marker dust gets all over EVERYTHING. As I'm writing, little bits of whiteboard ink get on my hands. It's even worse when I erase the board. It sends little particles flying everywhere. Every day, my hands are almost immediately coated in a layer of whiteboard marker grime. Almost all of my teacher's edition textbooks have black fingerprints in the corners of all the pages. The lectern that I teach from has to have a vigorous scrubbing at least once a week. I end up cleaning the covers of my textbooks about once a month or whenever I can't tell what color they originally were anymore, whichever comes first. I cannot wear white shirts or light colored pants to school if I want to look professional for longer than the first five minutes of first period. It even gets on the floor, which means I walk in it and track it all over the classroom.

I've started buying large packs of baby wipes and keeping them in my desk so that I can wash off my hands between classes without having to make a mad dash for the bathroom every hour. (Tangent - I sometimes also wipe down my students and/or things they try to hand me immediately after I have just watched them put said thing in their mouth. That happens probably more than you would think, especially with calculators students borrow from me. My observations tell me that calculators must be delicious.)

The biggest problem with the whole whiteboard marker thing is that I have mold in my classroom. Which means I have allergies in my classroom. Which means I have a really itchy nose, I sneeze repeatedly, and I rub my eyes a lot in my classroom. With my black hands. I always try to pick the cleanest part of my hand to use, but by fourth period, when I have my first break of the day and I go to the bathroom to wash up, I generally have black streaks all over my face.

Basically, this:

After 4 years of this, I have come to terms with the fact that I progressively begin to look more and more like a coal miner as the day wears on. I’m just praying I don’t get black lung.

Culinary Oddities

Something weird must be in the water this week. I guess I can't really say that here though, since I don't actually drink the water. Not from the tap, at least. All week long I've been eating pretty much ONLY all the foods I hated as a child. What has changed? For breakfast, I've been eating Muesli bars with dried fruit and nuts (too bad I can only get those in Bali...) or vegetable crackers with a large jar of fruit juice. The really amazing thing about this is that I rarely eat breakfast at all, much less on that involves fruit and vegetables! Also, I hated pretty much all of the above as a kid. Fruit, nuts, juice, veggies, granola type things. All of it. I guess lunch has been pretty normal since I have no say over what I eat. I eat whatever is served at the dorm every day... On Monday though, I gave Ibu Sri $5 and sent her to market to buy "salad ingredients" with instructions not to cook anything for me all week. Every night for dinner this week, I've made myself a salad. With homemade salad dressing. I even had her buy an onion for the salad. (Did you read that, mom?! I've voluntarily been eating ONIONS this week! I even sliced it myself!) Last night was an exception because I ate at a friend's house - vegetable soup and rice. And I had SECONDS. Again, all things I hated as a child. I hated onions up until Monday, apparently. I really don't know where I am going with this post. I really don't know where I am going with this stomach.

Weekending

One of my good friends here in town has some out of town visitors this month! Her mom and one of her best friends were able to come spend some time with her on this side of the world. I love it when guests come, whether they’re mine or not, because it gives us a good excuse for lots of awesome adventures!

Take this weekend for example. We traveled an hour away to visit some ancient temples that I’ve always heard about but never actually been to. They are called Gedong Songo. They are all on one complex, but there are 9 separate small temples that make up the entire thing. Sadly, only 7 of the temples remain. Our friend who drove us there said that the temples were discovered in 1742, but nobody really knows when they were built or who built them. They are built with a very Hindu style, and the way they are laid out is said to represent the various levels of Hindu spirituality, with the last one being nirvana. (I didn't research any of that, so I don't know if it is fact or local legend.) All of the buildings are at various altitudes, and it’s quite a hike to see all 7! In fact, due to time constraints, we only saw temples 1, 2, 3, and 5, but 5 is the one at the highest altitude, so I feel pretty good about myself for making it that far! Here are some pictures from that day.

My friend’s sweet baby, Amadea!

The view of temple 2

Gedong Songo sits in a horseshoe shaped curve of mountains facing out over a vast valley and the mountains on the far side of it. Here is some of the view.

Temple 2 again. It was hard to get nice pictures, because people were crawling all over the temples!

View of Temple 2 from afar.

Temple 2 close up. It is believed that the original builders used sharpened stones to cut these stones which were taken from the mountain. No mortar is used – all of the stones fit together like an elaborate puzzle!

People still use the inside of each temple as a place to pray and leave offerings.

Temple 5 – the highest temple.

There are both hot and cold springs located on the temple complex.

The view of Temple 5 (left) and Temple 4 (right) from Temple 3.

You can rent horses to ride!!

Temple 3 is comprised of 3 separate structures.

The view of Temple 3 (left) and Temple 2 (right) from Temple 5.

The view of Temple 3 from Temple 5.

We were worried that it would start pouring down rain on us! But the weather held out, thank goodness!

On Sunday, we went the opposite direction – almost all the way to the south coast of Java – to go spelunking! Did you watch the Amazing Race last season? Did you see the cave that the contestants had to rappel down into while they were in Jogjakarta? Well, I didn’t go into that one. But the one we went in was part of the same cave system! It is called Goa Cerme (Cerme Cave), and it is about a 3 kilometer long underground river. So basically, we were walking through a cave in waist deep water for 2 hours. It was more fun that it might sound. We encountered lots of bats and bugs I’ve never seen. We were told we would encounter eels, but that never happened, no complaints from me… It was awesome to see another aspect of creation – underground! Unfortunately, because I knew we would be wading and swimming the entire time, I didn’t take my camera with me - for its own good. However, when we came out the other end and hiked back to the car, we found a place where we could shower for 10 cents. So while I showered, the two guys wanted to explore, so I sent them with my camera. Most of the pictures below were taken by Yohanes or Paul, just for the record.

The six of us back at the car – hot, muddy, and wet.

We all went out the day before the trip and bought the cheapest shoes we could find since we knew they would probably get ruined. These were Valerie’s by the end of the trip! Mine held up a little better. Definitely worth the six dollars I paid for them!

We showered in that little cement cube. It had no roof, so anyone higher up on the mountain could see down in! Yikes!

Paul, one of my students, and outdoor adventure guide extraordinaire!! This was his fourth time to this particular cave, and he helped us get equipment and navigate.

Bad, bad picture, but you can see where we descended into the mouth of the cave and then the river flowing at the bottom.

The river is fed by a natural spring located at the other mouth of the cave, which was where we came out. It is considerably higher up the mountain than where we started, which made the hike back to the car nice and downhill. At this end of the cave, lots of local farmers from down the mountain have irrigation lines run.

The view from our starting point.

The mouth of the cave.

I definitely got my fill of exercise this weekend. I’m so thankful to live in such a beautiful place with so many wonders of nature and so much history. Even after 4 years, it amazes me!

Reasons Why I Don’t Want a Traditional Wedding

I’ve been meaning to create this post for a few weeks now. Remember the very bizarre poem in the wedding invitation? Well, if not, you can click HERE to read it. Questionable usage of the English language aside, I ended up going to the wedding with a group of friends. I’ve been to traditional weddings before, but I usually go by myself or with mutual white friends, not with a group of Javanese friends. This time I had the benefit of having all the steps and what they symbolize explained to me. I took copious notes. Here is my rough translation of what went down.

(I apologize in advance for poor picture quality. There were a million people crammed in there, so no matter what angle I took a picture from, it seemed that there was ALWAYS someone standing in between me and the shot I wanted. Also, it was dark inside, so some pictures are blurry and/or grainy.)

1. First of all, the wedding was in a HUGE community building. Lots of chairs lined a central aisle, all facing the aisle. At one end of the aisle was a heavily decorated stage stretching across the length of the room. The first thing that happened was that the bride came from somewhere behind the stage and just stood in front of the stage for a few minutes. Then after awhile, the groom came in from the outside – the opposite end of the aisle. They walked towards each other and met in the middle. She threw some kind of liquid at his legs, and then someone handed him an egg, which he smashed with his feet. Then the bride knelt down and cleaned everything off his legs and feet. This symbolizes the submission of the wife.

2. Once he was all cleaned up, a woman came behind them (maybe a relative?) and wrapped a blanket around both of their shoulders and walked them together to the stage at the end of the aisle.

As they did this, all the guests were served their first course – some kind of sweet bread.

3. Once they were settled in at the front, the groom hand fed some rice to his wife to symbolize that he is now her provider. They they both gave the other a drink of tea to show their willingness to serve each other.

At about this point, the wedding singers came out. And oh, let me tell you, if that wedding singer had been 40 years younger, I might not have been able to control myself…

I mean, the metallic yellow jacket practically made me fall in love with him anyways, but the mullet… oh, the mullet… I really regret not getting his number that night. Good thing I had my next course to focus on – soup! And that nasty neopolitan spam looking stuff in the middle was actually REALLY tasty!

4. Next, the bride and groom went to each set of parents to ask their blessing upon them and their marriage. Each set of parents was sitting on the stage as well, so they didn’t have to go too far. Before approaching the parents, they had to remove their shoes as a sign of respect for their elders.

After they finished that, we ate our main course. Yellow rice = party time!!

5. Then everyone got to go get their picture taken with the bride and groom. It took just about forever. Good thing we had ice cream and rose shaped jellies to keep us occupied while we waited our turn!

It was a delicious wedding, but a LONG one. The whole process took about 3 hours. And while I appreciate all the symbolism – right down to each of the bride’s hair ornaments, I really don’t look good in yellow, so no Javanese wedding for me! : )

Jadwalku

As of this week, here is my daily outside-of-school schedule.

Monday
- Give one guitar lesson
- Premarital counseling (new this week)

Tuesday
- Give 2 piano lessons
- Give one guitar lesson
- Supervise art club (new this week)

Wednesday
- National staff devotions
- Teacher meeting
- Small group Bible study

Thursday
- Bible study
- American Idol with American friends

Friday
- MY ONLY FREE NIGHT!!

Saturday
- Teach English in 3 villages
- Dinner with Tim AA (the AA Team - a group of Indonesian friends)

Sunday
- Church

So basically, once I make it through Wednesday, it's smooth sailing for the rest of the week.

I Must Be Doing Something Right

Yesterday the 9th graders asked me how much longer I would be teaching here. I told them honestly that I don't know. I've already agreed to be here one more year, but we'll see after that.

They asked me to stay 3 more years so I can teach them until they graduate then speak at their graduation ceremony.

I looked at them skeptically and said, "Are you SURE you want ME to speak at your graduation?"

They all said yes. Haha...

So in spite of what a bloody battlefield I feel like 9th grade has been this year, I have hope that they don't feel quite the same way.

Answers

My leg was right.

And We're Back

Yesterday, I taught the 9th graders about probability and odds. Probability is generally written as a decimal or percent. Odds are always written as fractions or ratios.

We went over that. And over that. And over that. I explained the difference. I explained why they are written that way. I gave real life examples of weathermen predicting the probability of rain using percents, and I talked about odds for and against horses down at the track and what those odds even mean.

I made them repeat after me. "Odds are ratios. Probabilities are decimals." We did about 25 example problems.

Just graded the homework. Four out of twelve students wrote odds as ratios and probabilities as percents. (And if you've been reading my blog for any time, you will notice that I gained 2 ninth graders recently. One just returned from an extended stay in India, and one just transferred to our school.)

Would I be out of line if I started tattooing general math facts on my students' bodies?

PS - Their new favorite quote - which I have heard every day this week - is, "I hate all the orphans in the world."

Predictions

The mountain says it will not rain today.
My right leg says it will.
WHICH ONE IS RIGHT?!

I've Corrupted Him

Aswan: Hey! I got a modem, so now I can get on the internet at home!
Me: Cool!
Aswan: How do you spell Pintrest? Pintarast? Pintarest? What is it?

Solo

Yesterday some friends and I drove to Solo to hang out and to celebrate some calm. Three friends have parents and/or friends coming within the next month, one got a promotion over the weekend and will have a lot more responsibility at work, one is facing language school evaluation tests this week, and I was headed back to school after spring break. So it was nice to get out of town and spend some time together before we all get too busy to.

We definitely had some unexpected highlights of the evening.

The first was finding Mason jars at Ace Hardware!! Ace Hardware here is VERY different from Ace Hardware in America. Basically, it's not even a hardware store. It is a very expensive upscale home furnishings store. They do have small lawn and garden, automotive, and power tool departments in which most of the items are imported. I don't shop there very often because I can't afford much there. But they sell imported Tide laundry detergent (for $22) and GooGone (for about $12 a bottle) and scented soy candles (for $17) and reed infusers (for $25). I sometimes like to go in and just walk through the aisles and smell all of those familiar smells. Anyways, I have never ever ever seen Mason jars for sale in Indonesia, so when I found them for a dollar each, I bought 6 pint size ones, and they are now my new drinking glasses. Stoked.

The second was stumbling upon a children's hip hop dance competition in the mall. With the exception of one kid who could spin on his head, the competition mostly consisted of 12 year olds in baggy clothes trying to look as ghetto as possible while they jumped up and down and waved their hands in the air on stage. We spent 99% of the time trying not to laugh at them, bless their hearts. It was definitely some great amusement for the evening!

The third thing happened while we were enjoying frozen yogurt and donuts, also in the mall. There were four guys and a girl sitting at the next table over from us, and soon after we sat down, one of the guys came over and asked us if we would be willing to model for him. Turns out, he's a local fashion designer and is planning on doing a shoot soon with his new line. I got his (very awesome looking) card and said we'd be in contact if we are interested. Playing it cool. I have to confess, I kind of want to do it just for the experience of having done it. A new adventure!

Other than that, there was one very amusing conversation that took place...
Aswan: I want to go to palace.
Me: You want to go to the palace?
Aswan: Yes.
Me: It's already dark out though... Wouldn't it be better to go during the daytime so you can see?
Aswan: Um... Maybe. We can go another time.

*an hour later while eating dinner at the best Italian restaurant on Java*
Aswan: PAYLESS! You thought I said PALACE! I said PAYLESS!
Me: .....what are you talking about?
Aswan: Earlier I said I want to go to Payless. The shoe store in the mall. You thought I said palace.
Me: OOOOOOH! Yes, yes I did.
Aswan: That's why I was so confused! I didn't know why I had to go shoe shopping in the daytime! I thought maybe it was an American thing, like you only shop for shoes when it's light out or something.
Me: Hahaha! No, it's not. We can go to Payless tonight. Do you need more shoes?
Aswan: Yes. I need variety.
Me: Oh my goodness...
Aswan: I like shopping!

Haha... For the record, even once I realized what he was saying, I still couldn't tell the difference between his pronunciation of "palace" and "Payless".

Home

Home from Bali. When I unpacked, I put everything I bought on the kitchen table for Aswan to review. And I realized what is most important to me. Not new clothes. Not souvenirs. It was FOOD. I bought about 20 pounds of food. Havarti cheese. Arm and Hammer baking soda. Lindt chocolate. Muesli bars. Candied cashews. Balinese coffee. And on and on and on. ILOVEFOOD! Haha...

I also had another realization today as I was thinking about going back to work tomorrow. I would take 20 hours on a bus to Bali with 14 high schoolers over going to work any day - it is way less stressful. And if you have never spent 20 hours straight locked on a bus with 14 teenagers, then you don't fully understand the complexity of the situation. Let me be clear - I came to the realization that I am REALLY dreading going back to work this week. And it is 100% because of the environment of conflict that has somehow been cultivated at our school this year. It seems like every day there is this coursing undertone of division and judgement and hurt. It rarely affects me directly. But I feel it. And it wears on me. I didn't realize how much until I spent a whole week away from it. This week in Bali was so low key and laid back and full of good memories and time spent with some of my favorite people in the world.

So I think that's why I'm still awake at 12:09 the night before school starts. I want to enjoy the last hours of my week away. I'm not ready to let it go yet. I don't want to go back to work.

Summer, please hurry up.

Spriiiiiiing break.
Goooooing to Bali!
Until Friiiiiday!

Pi Day!

Pi day is a math holiday celebrated on March 14th (3-14). I began celebrating it in my college nerd days, and I brought it to Indonesia with me. Since pi day occurs next week and we have spring break next week, we celebrated it today instead. Students memorized the digits of pi (record for the day – an 8th grader recited to 123 decimal places from memory), wrote songs about pi (I might try to load some of the videos later if the internet is behaving… HILARIOUS stuff), and ate lots and lots of pi! I mean… PIE!

Yesterday, the three math teachers made the nerdiest, silliest pi shirts we could think of out of some old shirts and sharpies we found.

And then I couldn’t resist trying on the crown intended for the winner of the pi memorization contest. So here is me web-camming myself (and a clearer shot of my shirt – anybody know what it means??? Only a few students could figure it out!).

Happy Pi Day a few days early!!

SRSLY?

Am I the only person alive who can’t understand the stupid internet security thingies that I have to type in order to post stuff on the internet?

I always get them wrong multiple times, and then I feel dumb, and then I just don’t want to post anything anymore.

The alternative is the audio captcha, where you can listen to words equally as jumbled up as the examples above and try to type what you hear. You should try one of those once, just for fun, even if you aren’t blind.

I AM NOT A MACHINE!

9th Grade Test

They came mostly prepared. But they still can't figure out that if they have a question, they should not carry their test through the room all the way to my desk to ask or shout my name loudly. RAISE. YOUR. HAND.

I've gotten a couple of interesting questions from them this period though.

1. Problem: Write the equation of a parabola whose vertex is at (-2, 3) and whose focus is at (-4, 3).

Student: So is this saying that the vertex is at (0, 0)?
Me: No. It says right there it's at (-2, 3).
Student: Oh..... *long pause* Why?

2. Problem: BONUS - A cell phone tower services a 14 mile radius. On a hiking trip, you are 7 miles east and 12 miles north of the tower. Are you in the region served by the tower? You must show work to get the bonus point - you can't just guess yes or no!

Student: Do we have to show work to get the bonus?

3. Problem: Tell what kind of conic is represented by the given equation.

Student: *loudly without raising hand first* For number 8, are there 2 "l"s in ellipse or just 1?

FINALLY!

Tonight at the store, I found somebody who gets even MORE attention than me!

First of all, let me preface this by saying the roads were busy and the store was packed when I got there. While driving (only about 1/2 a kilometer), two different guys shouted things at me, two teenage girls on a motorbike screamed, "YOU ARE MY SEESTER!", and more than a few kids dropped their toy cars to stare at me driving by. When I got to the store, there was a herd of parents with small children crowded around the front, waiting for their son or daughter's turn to ride the lone mechanical pony or car or whatever it is. They all stopped to watch me walk by. Once in the store, a few people in the checkout line got distracted from pulling items out of their baskets as I walked by.

So I got the few things I needed while pretending to not understand the things other shoppers whispered to one another about me being white.

Then I got in the checkout line. There were 3 people in front of me: an older lady, a young girl with a jilbab (head covering) on, and a man covered in tattoos. He had lots of piercings too. And wouldn't you know, it took that little girl a solid minute to even notice that I was standing there because she was too busy staring in awe at the tattooed man.

And then when she noticed, her eyes got really big. And she looked at me for 5 seconds. Then looked back at the man for 5 seconds. Back at me. Back at the man. She was visibly conflicted about who deserved to be stared at more. Until finally she had to turn around to pay for whatever she was buying, and the moment was over.

I was tempted to get the guy's number so I could invite him with me everywhere I go to offset the attention on me. But in the end, I just paid for my things, waded back through all the crying children waiting for their turn on the pony, and came home.

Morning News Headlines

Interesting juxtaposition, CNN.com. Good one.

Messy

Me: Ben. You need to start picking up your garbage before you leave my classroom. I'm tired of cleaning up your desk for you every day.
Ben: Think of it this way - I'm teaching you how to be a good wife someday.

Julian is Showing Some Improvement

Poem for today.

Ms. [my last name] was a teacher,
She really should have been a preacher,
Because she has a soft voice,
People have to rejoice,
She looks like Taylor Swift,
Which is really big gift.


At least this one rhymes.

Also, the family who was out of country having a baby that I was covering Yearbook class for came back! This is my first day of NOT having yearbook class, and I'm not sure what to do with my extra planning period today... It feels weird.

PS

Did I mention yet that next week is SPRING BREAK?!?!?!?!?

(Because it is.)

9th Grade Gets Pantsed

I realize I just posted about 9th grade less than 2 minutes ago. But then this happened.

Me: Richard. Have you found your math book yet?
Richard: No. It's lost.
Me: Have you been looking for it?
Richard: No.
Me: You should. Because if you don't find it, you have to pay for it. And in the meantime, you have no math book.
Richard: How much does it cost? I'll just buy a new one right now.
Me: Or you could just look for your old one.
Richard: I always lose things. Everything. Pens. Pencils. Papers. Books. Everything.
Me: Perfect...
Ani: Oh, I understand that! I always lose things too! I lost two cell phones on the angkot (public minibus) last year!
Me: Wow... TWO?
Ani: Yeah. And then I lost my pants on the angkot.

Voodoo and Seating Charts

The 9th graders officially think I do voodoo on the board during class. They are basically in awe of how math works every time I explain a complicated problem. They understand how to do it, but they still claim that I do black magic. I find this extremely amusing.

Right before 9th grade, during 10 minute break, a 10th grader came to my room with a proposed new seating chart. See, there is this girl he likes, but there are also 2 other boys in the 10th grade who like her. Hence, he needs to sit extra close to her so he can impress her with his mathematical prowess (or so I assume his thought process went). So in this proposed new seating chart, said girl is sitting in the very back corner desk with the boy who made the chart seated immediately next to her. Then everyone else in front of them and diagonal from them is a girl. Clever boy.

Hints

Ways I can tell that my house was built by Asians. Exhibit 1.

I have to stand like this to wash the dishes. The countertops are not even 3 feet high.

Oh, Those Jagas of Mine

*First, I just need to say that the majority of the following conversation took place between me and a jaga that I am friends with. So while it starts out sounding kind of creepy when taken out of context, it was not at all. He was teasing me.*

Jaga 1: *While opening the gate* You need to take responsibility.
Me: What are you talking about?
Jaga 1: You just really need to take responsibility.
Me: For what?!
Jaga 1: For being in my dreams so much lately.
Me: WHAT?! Those are your dreams, not mine! You're the one who has to take responsibility!
Jaga 1: I guess so. But I can't help it. I think I just miss you, so I meet you in my dreams. I haven't seen you for a long time.
Me: I know. Someone asked me the other day if you still work here because nobody has seen you for like a month. Have you been working night shift?
Jaga 1: Yeah, for 2 weeks now, I've been working the overnight shift. *pulls a stool out of the jaga shack and pats the seat* Here. Sit.
Me: It looks like it's gonna rain. I should get home.
Jaga 1: Talk to me for a minute. I'm bored here by myself.
Me: Fiiiiiine. But only for a minute.
Jaga 1: When are you getting married?
Me: In July. When are you getting married?
Jaga 1: HA! I have to find somebody who wants me first. I cry a lot these days.
Me: Don't cry! Why do you cry?
Jaga 1: One, because I'm still single. Two, because you're getting married.
Me: Haha... Don't cry!
*enter Mas Wiwin - a janitor*
Jaga 1: Hey! She's getting married in July!
Mas Wiwin: Really? I'm getting married in June!
Me: NO WAY! Are you REALLY?!
Mas Wiwin: Yup. I got a village woman to marry me!
Me: Are you lying??
Mas Wiwin: Nope. She's going to move in with me and my mom and bring me lunch at school so I don't have to go out in the rain!
Jaga 1: Luckyyyyy...
Me: Oh...
*enter Jaga 2*
Jaga 1: Hey, they're both getting married this year!
Jaga 2: Yeah, when ARE you and Aswan getting married?
Me: Probably July.
Jaga 2: How old are you?
Me: 25
Jaga 2: Yeah, you better get married now or you'll be too old.
Me: I'll be expired.
*exit Mas Wiwin, who went home for the night*
Me: Well, I better go home. I think Aswan is there, and we didn't eat dinner yet.
Jaga 1: You make him dinner?
Me: Yeah...
Jaga 2: *to Jaga 1* Aswan is a lucky man. She's skinny AND she cooks.
Jaga 1: And she's BEAUTIFUL!

Haha... Whenever I have a bad day, I just hang out by the front gate.