The Time I Wore the Same Pants For A Week

I thought things were slowly calming down and getting more normal. Then the last three weeks happened. And they were full of crazy. A bad kind of crazy. Not crazy busy. But more like people being crazy. Like students behaving badly. In ways that we have never experienced. In ways that we are not equipped to deal with. We are doing our best to muddle through the crazy with much research and many prayers. Ultimately, we have already sent two students home to receive therapy/counseling that we just can't provide for them here.

There have also been people getting crazy sick - two teachers and a student have been medevaced to Singapore. Which makes things crazier yet for those who remain here as we try to cover their classes while feebly attempting to maintain some semblance of order within our school walls while PEOPLE BE CRAZY.

I can't even share publicly about the majority of what has been happening. But believe me. IT HAS BEEN CRAZY.

I have been stressed out and brokenhearted and burdened and... TIRED. But yesterday, as I sat in class, I felt like God began to speak to my heart and show me what amazing people I was surrounded by. At that very moment, I was sitting on top of an empty desk right in the middle of the 10th grade class. Kids! Crazy kids! But I began looking around the room, thinking of each student in turn. Thinking of their character and the men and women I see them becoming right before my very eyes. And man, God was right. I was in the midst of greatness.

Later on in the day, we were praying as a staff. As we prayed about the many, many crazy and complicated and heartbreaking situations happening here, once again, I felt God begin speaking to my heart. He said three things.

1. I know.
2. I am bigger.
3. I have overcome.

And folks, there is so much PEACE in those three simple things.

It doesn't make the crazy any less crazy. But it at least makes it more bearable.

So please be praying with us as we try to contain the crazy. As we try to keep it together. As we try to lead young people in truth. As we seek wisdom. As we learn to recognize one another's brokenness and yet love as Jesus loves. As we make hard decisions. And as we desperately try to get a good night's sleep in the middle of all the crazy.

Accidental Yoga

I am not an active person. If I could choose to be any other type of creature, I would probably choose a sloth or a slug. Or maybe some sort of animal that hibernates through all the bad seasons of the year. That sounds like a great life.

But I got stuck being a human. And while I generally like being a human, all the expectations that go along with it are tiresome. Like comb your hair. And bathe. And get dressed. And only pee in toilets. And brush your teeth. And go to work. And sleep only at night. And cover your mouth when you sneeze. And eat healthy foods. And watch your weight. And exercise.

I'm used to being a human. I've been a human my whole life. So most of the expectations are pretty easy for me because I've grown accustomed to them. Except for the first one and the last one, really. I can't comb my hair. And I hate to exercise.

However, being the reasonable human being that I am, I recognize that exercise IS important. Especially because I lied earlier and "eat healthy foods" is actually probably the hardest expectation of all, and if I could afford it, I would eat nachos every day for dinner.

So this school year, I decided to exercise more. It's supposed to help with stress (and if you've been reading my blog lately, you know that stress and I have been inseparable this semester). And really, who doesn't want to look/feel/be healthier?

Since I have claimed the slug sloth (an animal that I just now made up) as my spirit animal, naturally I chose the least rigorous form of fitness that I could get away with and still call it "exercise". So back in August, I signed up for yoga classes at a local gym. Because what form of exercise is lower than yoga, right?

WRONG.

I AM IN PAIN EVERY DAY OF MY LIFE. My inner slug sloth is SLOWLY DYING.

Just kidding. It's not really that dramatic. I always thought that yoga was an old lady's sport. Until I did 18 sun salutations and a 345 minute plank, all in one session.

I'm being dramatic again.

Here's what's for real. I do yoga twice a week on Tuesdays and Thursdays for about 90 minutes each time. I get sweat in my eyeballs, and it burns. I bend my body in ways that I didn't know were humanly possible. I get cramps in my armpits REGULARLY. I sometimes have to sit down because I just can't do it anymore, and I sometimes fall over because I am just generally bad at all things athletic. I wake up with sore abs, legs, and shoulders every Wednesday and Friday.

But I KEEP GOING BACK.

My very first day there, after the session ended, the instructor came over to the pile of steaming sweat panting on the floor (aka me) and said, "You do yoga a lot, yeah?" I blinked a lot at her. Then I said, "No. I've never done yoga in my life."

I started out ABLE. I was able to follow all the instructions in Indonesian. I was able to DO (not necessarily maintain) every pose. Enough, at least, to look like I knew what I was doing. And now, every time I go, I try to hold the poses a little longer, to bend a little further, to stand a little more steady than the last time. And, if  I'm being honest, I also try to do better than everyone else in the room (which can never happen because I'm pretty sure half the ladies in the class just straight up HAVE NO BONES).

When Melanie moved back to town, she started going with me. It's been fun to have a friend there to shoot panicked looks to when the instructor asks us to do things like sit with our legs straight out in front of us and touch our foreheads to our knees or hold on to our big toe with one hand and lift our foot higher than our head.

Yesterday's class took an awkward turn. In an unprecedented move, the instructor had us partner up and do yoga together. It was basically like in those movies where two people who are not actually a couple, through some series of unfortunate and hilarious events, somehow end up in a mystical romantic yoga session. I couldn't keep a straight face as Melanie and I stood butt to butt, bent over in opposite directions to link arms through our spread legs.

It was definitely the most entertaining yoga session to date. But I'm ready to get back to attempting to plank longer and straighter than everyone else as my inner slug sloth slowly dies.

Things I've Said Recently that I Never Thought I'd Say

"I almost ran over a goat on the way to yoga today."

"Yes, both of my parents are white."

"Why is there a bird in my classroom?"

"Yes, I will change your grade to an A posthumously if you die during the school year."

"CAT, DON'T BRING THAT DRAGON IN MY HOUSE!"

"Stop touching your neighbor. Now."

"I think my lower leg bones are disproportionately long."

"I bought these pants from someone's living room."

"If you make the shark angry, isn't it MORE LIKELY to bite you?"

"Stop calling me Mariah Carey."

"I'd rather use a squatty potty."