Bragging

So I'm going to brag a little bit for a minute.

On Friday of last week, I was informed that I had to take what's called the Ujian Kompetensi Guru. It's an Indonesian teacher competency exam. The test date was today (four days since Friday).

Over the weekend, I basically went through the five states of grief.

1. Denial. They aren't REALLY going to make us take an exam during finals week - the most stressful week of the year. They can't do that. If they are serious about this, I just won't show up. Not gonna happen.

2. Anger. WHY ARE YOU MAKING ME TAKE YOUR DUMB TEST DURING FINALS WEEK? I! AM! BUSY! THIS IS TOO STRESSFUL! And it is NOT FAIR to make teachers certified in other countries take your stupid Indonesian test! If you're going to force me to do this, then you should at least offer it in ENGLISH. Or give me more time to prepare! Or tell me what I should study!

3. Bargaining. If I score higher than the national average on this test, will your government certify me? Can I get a raise? Can I get a permanent visa?

4. Depression. Who am I kidding? I can't pass this test. The national average is only like 50%. I barely speak Indonesian. I know nothing. I hope I get dengue.

5. Acceptance. I guess if I HAVE to do it, I might as well do a good job at it.

I was busy Friday night, Saturday, and Sunday, so I didn't really get a chance to study until Monday. I studied for EIGHT HOURS last night using any and all online materials I could find. I MADE FLASHCARDS. And in a matter of one day, I went from scoring 40% on practice tests to consistently scoring 70-90%. So I set a goal for myself. I wanted to score over 80%.

After all that hard work, I was scared I'd bomb the test. I was a bundle of nerves all day. After lunch, I headed to the test center with several other teachers and three translators (our one allowance) from my school. The test had two parts to it - pedagogy and subject matter. So my exam was a mix of pedagogical questions (which in many cases have totally OPPOSITE answers of what they would have on an American exam) and math questions. And it was entirely in Indonesian. I was not allowed to use a calculator, only scratch paper. And the room was super noisy as translators translated for my coworkers.

I finished the 2 hour test with only 5 seconds remaining on the clock. My score popped up on the screen. (Am I making this dramatic enough??)

46/60.

77%.

I fell just short of my goal. I was disappointed at first. Then a little horrified that on my school's grading scale, that is a D. I got a D in MY CAREER.

Then I realized a few things.

The actual national average for this year's test is 47%. Those are Indonesian trained college graduates who teach in the Indonesian school system. Scoring an average of 47%.

One of our translators told me his wife has been teaching in Indonesian schools for 33 years, and she only scored 62% on the exam.

The passing grade is 55%.

The highest score from our school (including Indonesian teachers) prior to today was 58%. And that record was held by an English teacher whose test was IN English.

The highest score from my province this year is 82.5%.

I know you're not supposed to compare yourself to other people, and I really hate it when my students do that. But man, that really changed my perspective. And now I'm pretty happy with my 77%. So I'm having nachos for dinner to celebrate! :)