9th Grade Test

They came mostly prepared. But they still can't figure out that if they have a question, they should not carry their test through the room all the way to my desk to ask or shout my name loudly. RAISE. YOUR. HAND.

I've gotten a couple of interesting questions from them this period though.

1. Problem: Write the equation of a parabola whose vertex is at (-2, 3) and whose focus is at (-4, 3).

Student: So is this saying that the vertex is at (0, 0)?
Me: No. It says right there it's at (-2, 3).
Student: Oh..... *long pause* Why?

2. Problem: BONUS - A cell phone tower services a 14 mile radius. On a hiking trip, you are 7 miles east and 12 miles north of the tower. Are you in the region served by the tower? You must show work to get the bonus point - you can't just guess yes or no!

Student: Do we have to show work to get the bonus?

3. Problem: Tell what kind of conic is represented by the given equation.

Student: *loudly without raising hand first* For number 8, are there 2 "l"s in ellipse or just 1?

FINALLY!

Tonight at the store, I found somebody who gets even MORE attention than me!

First of all, let me preface this by saying the roads were busy and the store was packed when I got there. While driving (only about 1/2 a kilometer), two different guys shouted things at me, two teenage girls on a motorbike screamed, "YOU ARE MY SEESTER!", and more than a few kids dropped their toy cars to stare at me driving by. When I got to the store, there was a herd of parents with small children crowded around the front, waiting for their son or daughter's turn to ride the lone mechanical pony or car or whatever it is. They all stopped to watch me walk by. Once in the store, a few people in the checkout line got distracted from pulling items out of their baskets as I walked by.

So I got the few things I needed while pretending to not understand the things other shoppers whispered to one another about me being white.

Then I got in the checkout line. There were 3 people in front of me: an older lady, a young girl with a jilbab (head covering) on, and a man covered in tattoos. He had lots of piercings too. And wouldn't you know, it took that little girl a solid minute to even notice that I was standing there because she was too busy staring in awe at the tattooed man.

And then when she noticed, her eyes got really big. And she looked at me for 5 seconds. Then looked back at the man for 5 seconds. Back at me. Back at the man. She was visibly conflicted about who deserved to be stared at more. Until finally she had to turn around to pay for whatever she was buying, and the moment was over.

I was tempted to get the guy's number so I could invite him with me everywhere I go to offset the attention on me. But in the end, I just paid for my things, waded back through all the crying children waiting for their turn on the pony, and came home.

Morning News Headlines

Interesting juxtaposition, CNN.com. Good one.

Messy

Me: Ben. You need to start picking up your garbage before you leave my classroom. I'm tired of cleaning up your desk for you every day.
Ben: Think of it this way - I'm teaching you how to be a good wife someday.

Julian is Showing Some Improvement

Poem for today.

Ms. [my last name] was a teacher,
She really should have been a preacher,
Because she has a soft voice,
People have to rejoice,
She looks like Taylor Swift,
Which is really big gift.


At least this one rhymes.

Also, the family who was out of country having a baby that I was covering Yearbook class for came back! This is my first day of NOT having yearbook class, and I'm not sure what to do with my extra planning period today... It feels weird.

PS

Did I mention yet that next week is SPRING BREAK?!?!?!?!?

(Because it is.)

9th Grade Gets Pantsed

I realize I just posted about 9th grade less than 2 minutes ago. But then this happened.

Me: Richard. Have you found your math book yet?
Richard: No. It's lost.
Me: Have you been looking for it?
Richard: No.
Me: You should. Because if you don't find it, you have to pay for it. And in the meantime, you have no math book.
Richard: How much does it cost? I'll just buy a new one right now.
Me: Or you could just look for your old one.
Richard: I always lose things. Everything. Pens. Pencils. Papers. Books. Everything.
Me: Perfect...
Ani: Oh, I understand that! I always lose things too! I lost two cell phones on the angkot (public minibus) last year!
Me: Wow... TWO?
Ani: Yeah. And then I lost my pants on the angkot.

Voodoo and Seating Charts

The 9th graders officially think I do voodoo on the board during class. They are basically in awe of how math works every time I explain a complicated problem. They understand how to do it, but they still claim that I do black magic. I find this extremely amusing.

Right before 9th grade, during 10 minute break, a 10th grader came to my room with a proposed new seating chart. See, there is this girl he likes, but there are also 2 other boys in the 10th grade who like her. Hence, he needs to sit extra close to her so he can impress her with his mathematical prowess (or so I assume his thought process went). So in this proposed new seating chart, said girl is sitting in the very back corner desk with the boy who made the chart seated immediately next to her. Then everyone else in front of them and diagonal from them is a girl. Clever boy.

Hints

Ways I can tell that my house was built by Asians. Exhibit 1.

I have to stand like this to wash the dishes. The countertops are not even 3 feet high.

Oh, Those Jagas of Mine

*First, I just need to say that the majority of the following conversation took place between me and a jaga that I am friends with. So while it starts out sounding kind of creepy when taken out of context, it was not at all. He was teasing me.*

Jaga 1: *While opening the gate* You need to take responsibility.
Me: What are you talking about?
Jaga 1: You just really need to take responsibility.
Me: For what?!
Jaga 1: For being in my dreams so much lately.
Me: WHAT?! Those are your dreams, not mine! You're the one who has to take responsibility!
Jaga 1: I guess so. But I can't help it. I think I just miss you, so I meet you in my dreams. I haven't seen you for a long time.
Me: I know. Someone asked me the other day if you still work here because nobody has seen you for like a month. Have you been working night shift?
Jaga 1: Yeah, for 2 weeks now, I've been working the overnight shift. *pulls a stool out of the jaga shack and pats the seat* Here. Sit.
Me: It looks like it's gonna rain. I should get home.
Jaga 1: Talk to me for a minute. I'm bored here by myself.
Me: Fiiiiiine. But only for a minute.
Jaga 1: When are you getting married?
Me: In July. When are you getting married?
Jaga 1: HA! I have to find somebody who wants me first. I cry a lot these days.
Me: Don't cry! Why do you cry?
Jaga 1: One, because I'm still single. Two, because you're getting married.
Me: Haha... Don't cry!
*enter Mas Wiwin - a janitor*
Jaga 1: Hey! She's getting married in July!
Mas Wiwin: Really? I'm getting married in June!
Me: NO WAY! Are you REALLY?!
Mas Wiwin: Yup. I got a village woman to marry me!
Me: Are you lying??
Mas Wiwin: Nope. She's going to move in with me and my mom and bring me lunch at school so I don't have to go out in the rain!
Jaga 1: Luckyyyyy...
Me: Oh...
*enter Jaga 2*
Jaga 1: Hey, they're both getting married this year!
Jaga 2: Yeah, when ARE you and Aswan getting married?
Me: Probably July.
Jaga 2: How old are you?
Me: 25
Jaga 2: Yeah, you better get married now or you'll be too old.
Me: I'll be expired.
*exit Mas Wiwin, who went home for the night*
Me: Well, I better go home. I think Aswan is there, and we didn't eat dinner yet.
Jaga 1: You make him dinner?
Me: Yeah...
Jaga 2: *to Jaga 1* Aswan is a lucky man. She's skinny AND she cooks.
Jaga 1: And she's BEAUTIFUL!

Haha... Whenever I have a bad day, I just hang out by the front gate.

Jokes, Courtesy of 10th Grade

Q: What do you call a donkey with its head chopped off?
A: A DEAD DONKEY!

Q: What do you call a sine that is co?
A: A COSINE!

Also, last night Julian apparently spent quite a bit of time writing more poems, this time about his classmates. "There once was a boy named Zach, who played music like Bach." Another started, "There once was a boy named Ben, who liked Esther even though she doesn't like him." But my favorite was:

There once was a boy who liked schnitzel,
And he liked to eat pretzels,
Too.

Goodness, what am I going to do with this class?

The Expanse Between Maturity Levels is Vast

So if you've been reading my blog lately, you've surely become accustomed to some of the bizarre things we talk about in 8th - 10th grade. However, I rarely mention my first class of the day - 11th and 12th grade PreCalculus. I'm still not sure if they are incredibly more mature than the younger classes, or if they are all just brain dead that early in the morning, thus creating the illusion that they are extremely well behaved.

Anyways, here's a conversation that took place this morning that I think gives you a pretty good idea of the maturity gap between this class and my other classes.

Student: Do you know the verses that say that if you forgive others, God will forgive you, but if you don't forgive others, God won't forgive you?
Me: Yeah...
Student: Does that make God an unforgiving God?

Holy cow.

Poetry

I gave the 10th graders a new seating chart today, and I then proceeded to spend the first 10 minutes of class listening to them complain about it. Subsequently, they now know that if they have a problem with the seating chart (or any other decision) I have made, they can come TALK (not complain) to me about it after class IFF (if and only if) they have a valid reason AND a possible solution to offer. Goodness.

I have one student who is hyper-chatty no matter who he is sitting by. I've even tried seating him alone in the front of the room. Then he tries to talk to me the whole time. Recently, I've been bombarded with incredibly BAD jokes such as, "Hey what is Sun Joon's brother's name?" And the punch line is him screaming, "MOON JOON!!!! GET IT?!? SUN JOON AND MOON JOON!!!" (Sun Joon is a student whose brother is actually named Sun Ho.) Said student has been banned from telling jokes in the classroom. He managed to sneak one in today though by raising his hand and asking me, "What is the similarity between a hexagon and a pentagon?" I was about to give him the geometric answer when he shouted, "THEY RHYME!!! GET IT?!? HexaGON and pentaGON!!!"

I looked at him skeptically, to which he responded, "What? Did you fail English or something? Why aren't you laughing? THEY RHYME!" I thought long and hard about pointing out that this is his second year in a row in the 10th grade, but I decided against it. Instead, I simply told him that those words don't rhyme. He insisted they do. So instead of arguing, I moved on. Then after the lesson, I had the class get started on their homework and (using some online help), I wrote the following poem and gave it to him. His name is Julian, BTW.

There once was a boy named Julian
Who only dreamed to be a beautician
But sadly, he was too Beckettian
So instead he became Belarussian

I asked him if it rhymed or not. He checked and said, "Of COURSE! The last word in each line ends in -ian!" So just to check, I said, "Wait. So you're telling me that your name, Julian, rhymes with the word 'beautician'?" He very confidently said it did. He then asked me to define beautician, Beckettian, and Belarussian for him. Once he was satisfied in knowing what the poem actually meant, he quieted down, and I thought the matter was dropped.

But when the final bell rang, he came over to my desk, dropped a piece of paper on it, and said, "Now I wrote a poem for you. Read it."

There once was a woman named Abby
Who was always very naggy
She was very mean to Julian
She thought he was a hooligan
She always made him fail
Because she thinks he wants to do nails


Can I just say - BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Yeah, I Did That...

Current Facebook status of a student I taught Algebra 2 to my first year here.

"I love how about 5 years ago when I learned imaginary numbers I saw no practical use for them and I figured I would never use them again. I use them all the time now."

Validated.

Papua

Over the past few years, I’ve had several friends who have moved to work in Papua – not to be confused with Papua New Guinea, which is its own separate country. Papua shares the island of New Guinea with PNG, but Papua, also known as Irian Jaya, is actually a part of Indonesia.

In this picture, Australia is the large land mass at the bottom, Papua New Guinea is on the east side of the big island, and the west side is occupied by Papua.

In spite of the number of friends and acquaintances of mine who live there, I know relatively little about Papua and its culture. Through the Facebook page of a family I know who works in northern Papua, I found a link to the website of an Indonesian photographer who travelled there (a loooong trip. Java – where most of the population of Indonesia lives – isn’t even shown on the map above because it’s so far away) to photograph and put a face on the HIV/AIDS pandemic currently happening.

So if you’re like me and are curious to know more, click HERE to see some awesome pictures, and be sure to click “Show Caption” at the bottom of each photo in the slideshow to read and learn!

10th grade

Me: Joseph, why aren't you sitting in your assigned seat?
Joseph: WHOA! How can you tell?
Me: Um... Because I have eyes... And you normally sit in the front row. But now you're not. JinDo is. It's kind of obvious.
Joseph: But we're both Korean. How can you tell we switched seats?
Me: I CAN TELL YOU APART!

Note(s) to Self

1. The ATM will not accept your driver's license. No matter how hard you push it.

2. Even if it is nice and sunny after church, you should NOT go driving for an hour through the villages and rice paddies in a skirt. Creepy men abound.

3. You should not buy two blocks of butter before going driving for an hour through the villages and rice paddies in the Sunday sunshine. Butter melts.

4. You should know by now that no matter how sunny it is after church, it can start pouring down rain at any moment without notice. And it will.

5. No, your tire is not flat. You're just paranoid. And all those people are honking at you for a different reason. See number 2.

6. You are off your game. Take a nap.

Pictures of the Month

It’s that time of the month again. I’ve hardly posted any pictures lately, so here are some that I’ve snapped throughout February.

1. At the beginning of the month, this group of insects would begin to emerge from beneath my bathroom sink every single night at about 8 PM. If I turned the light on, they would all run back underneath though. I began to fear that they would make their way into my bedroom and eat me in my sleep, so I mostly just shut the bathroom door and left the light on all night in order to deter them. I haven’t seen them for a couple of weeks now, so maybe they are gone for good.

Those pictures were taken on 2 different nights. Sometimes I would notice the bugs when they were first starting to emerge. Sometimes I would be sitting on the couch and would see them stampeding around the corner. Ew.

2. Banquet season. This was my favorite banquet invitation by one of my favorite kids TO one of my favorite kids. I teach them both first period, so boy kid came to school early with a toddler that he borrowed and a bunch of red roses. He set up like so:

But after I took the picture, he zipped the jacket up again, and waited for girl. When she walked into class, she saw him standing there with an adorable child waiting to hand her a bouquet of red roses. Boy gave her a minute to realize that this was for her, told the kid to hand her the roses, then unzipped his jacket, revealing his all important question. This was her reaction.

Returning the child. Notice that the back of his shirt has three boxes that say “Yes”, “No”, and “Maybe” beside them. With the roses, he also handed her a permanent marker so she could check one. She checked yes (After this picture was taken, obviously).

3. So one day I was walking out of my classroom as this guy walked in, not at all fazed when we passed in the doorway. Most of these skinks are really skittish and would rather die than be near a human, but not this one. A few hours later, I was typing something up at my desk, and I heard motion behind me. This guy was just chilling on the bookshelf, watching me type. The next day, I was sitting at my desk, and felt something substantial crawling up my leg. I looked down, and saw his tail sticking out from under my pants leg. So I started jumping around and kicking my leg like a crazy person until he fell out. Then he hung around my desk the rest of the day. The skink with no fear…

4. I took some pictures of the rain one day. I had to walk from the school to the second story of the boys dorm for batik class (that’s where the art room is), and right as I got to the end of the covered walkways, this happened. Aish.

And then looking back from the art room. The lawn is turning into a lake within 10 minutes.

But still, I feel like no matter how many rain pictures I take and post, it will never capture the full effect of the torrential-ness of rainy season.

5. Apparently girl cat is very non-discriminating about which of my crafts she will fall asleep on. I was cross-stitching a Russian doll that I found a picture of on etsy, and she decided it would make a nice bed, I guess?

6. The afternoon sun shining in my kitchen window. It is so rare these days to see the sun in the afternoon/evening due to rainy season. So one day I came home from work and found this sight, and I loved it so much that I took a picture to remember it.

7. I keep finding these little things on the outside of my house. They’re some kind of cocoon with a built in chain link fence. Pretty cool if you ask me.

With a termite stuck in a spider’s web.

On my front door.

In my front window, taken from inside.

And then I found this terrifying little guy, so maybe his kind keeps making these things?

8. My little bird. I found him outside my house one night. And by “found”, I actually mean, “took him away from my cat who was about to play with it to death”. It’s an Indonesian sparrow, but it was still too little to fly. So I kept it for one night and gave it food and water. And then it died. Sad.

Yeah… He’s a little bit wet with cat spit. Below is the “nest” I made for him in a laundry basket. And that’s how he would look at me every time I whistled at him.

9. Here is a fact about me. I will buy anything that comes in awesome packaging. You don’t find that often in Indonesia. They’re not really big on creative/artistic marketing of goods. But then I found this soap. From China. In a random little supermarket that just opened up down the street from the school. And I don’t really use bar soap all that much. But I bought this one. Because I’m in love with it. Also, it is sandalwood scented. Yum.

 

10. There are a lot of praying mantises here.  I see them fairly regularly. But I grew up in a place where they are nearly on the endangered animals list, and it was always a huge deal when we found one. So I still get a little bit excited when I see one. Like yesterday.

OK. That’s all now!!

Impersonations

That 8th graders are currently working on homework and practicing their impersonations of each other. They're pretty good.

Their impersonation of me went, "WAKE UP, RG!"

RG was not amused. Hahaha...

Proofreading

Proofing a paper on HIV/AIDS. Closing sentence really caught my attention.

"So what I want to tell you is that be careful whenever and wherever because you don't know in which moment you may receive AIDS."

Scary stuff.